So, as much as I love music--and I truly love music--there are times when listening to a tired, old radio station just doesn't do it for me. Same with the CDs that are artfully arranged in a display akin to a 3-year old's toybox in the backseat of my car. When this happens, I tune into NPR--National Public Radio, for those of you not "in the know" about it. I love NPR; it inspires me. In fact, I get many of my lesson ideas from listening to it. There is a segment I particularly love on NPR called "This I Believe" and it was the inspiration behind this week's blog post. Actually, it was an inspiration for a blog I posted last year, but it so happens that it very neatly coincides with the speech you are going to be giving soon, so I figured I'd go green and recycle.
Have you ever thought about what the guiding principles in your life are? By guiding principles I simply mean the things in life that you truly and fundamentally believe; the beliefs that shape your decisions when you find yourself in a position where you have to make one. Perhaps it is the notion that "everyone, no matter how seemingly insignificant, has something to teach us" or something as common as the idea that "all men are created equal and are endowed with certain inalienable rights...among them...life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness" or "treat others the way that you wish to be treated" or "blood is thicker than water."
Those are just some generic examples, but your challenge this week is explore some of your own core beliefs and choose one guiding principle that you would like to shape your journey into adulthood and throughout life. Don't get caught up in tired cliches or age-old aphorisms; be creative, be yourself. Really think about the beliefs that you hold near and dear to your heart and try to capture them in your own words. Talk about why these beliefs are important to you and how you came to recognize them. (400-450 words/75pts)
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oh my God, I love NPR..me and my dad listen to All things considered,wait wait..don't tell me and fresh air all the time..
I'm with both of you. Ever since my dad got his XM radio that's all we listen to. NPR, PBC, and old radio shows like the adventures of sherlock holmes, haha.
XD
ugh i hate being sick, and i should do my blog, and i've been considering what i want to write about but right now its just not coming. maybe i'll try a little later. I never thought i'd miss school. haha.
It came to me on the bus. Weird, I know. But I was just thinking about the blog. I thought I already had my answer. I was going to say that I live my life through the meaning of fate, “everything happens for a reason.” But then I thought that was too cliché. And at times I don’t believe I live my life that way. Often I question why god has put me into a position, often feeling bad for myself. So fate was out of the question, I don’t honestly live my life that way, it is probably something I did wish I lived by. I am a religious person. Compared to other teenagers my age, I have liberal views about the world and quite conservative views for myself. And I do believe in fate. But the fact that I question fate, question why I am given these tasks, doesn’t make it the guiding principle that I want to follow. Then I thought of karma. Karma is something that I honestly believe in, what comes around goes around. Whenever something bad happens to me or someone else, I blame it on karma. Blame is the key word, I rarely think of karma in the positive sense. So I can’t say I live my life on the belief on karma either.
But it was the talk that Mr. Matlack gave us in class today that really got me thinking. After we got our abysmal midterms back, he said that our grade does not reflect who we are as a person. We will still wake up tomorrow and be the same person we are today. If something amazing happened to us, a fat head isn’t necessary, because we are still the same person we were before the event that changed our life. If something bad happened, brush it off, because you will wake up tomorrow, and still be you. You just need to strive to do better next time.
I first heard the motto, “You will wake up tomorrow and still be Molly Gondolf,” about a year ago. I was at a travel meet in Maryland, without my parents, just our team. And I was having a horrible weekend. It was after my 500 at finals on one of the first nights, and let’s just say, I didn’t do so great. So as emotional as I am, when I walked up to my coach, I began to cry. For the past five months I was working my ass off at practice, and I couldn’t perform when I was needed. I wave of disappointment crept through me, one of the worst feelings ever. I have let down my parents, my coach, myself. My swim coach is a bit like my second dad. He used to pick me up from school when I didn’t have a ride to practice, I would babysit his kids, and I tell him almost everything about my life. He knows me. And when we were talking after the race he asked me, “Will you wake up tomorrow, and still be Molly Gondolf?” And I nodded, and realized how I have to put things into perspective. Life is full of challenges, and I do believe that God gives you these challenges to make you a better person, to test your moral character. But most of these challenges that we face are minute, we will face bigger and better things in life. After the talk with my coach I realized that whatever crap happens to me, even if I feel like I can’t handle it, I will still wake up tomorrow and be me.
I don’t know if I answered this question fully, and I am a bit hesitant for this to actually be my answer for this blog. It is difficult for a teenager to know what principle they live their life by. But I guess I have, for the time being.
Over the course of my childhood every year, month, and even on a daily basis, I wanted to be something else when I grew up. Adulthood seemed so far away and the possibilities were endless! I had some strange career ideas, not like most children may have, for one thing I wanted to be a cashier at Acme because I remember being fascinated with the scanner. Another thing I wanted to be was a stripper (not my proudest moment) but I can say that I was too young to know what a stripper was, I just wanted to be pretty and wear bikinis like the girls are on the sign did. At one point I longed to be a librarian; that dream was one of the longer lasting ones. I remember my best friend in fourth grade teasing me constantly about that dream, and called me a nerd! She still brings that up all the time. Wanting to be a librarian turned into wanting to be a teacher, then to a fashion designer, and now a TV broadcaster for the Today Show or something to that effect. My parents raised me on the belief that I can be any one I want to be, and embraced any path I decided to take (though I think the stripper goal was even a little too much for them ). They taught me that I can accomplish anything I set my mind to, and to never give up because if you give up then you will never see what you could have done.
When I wanted to be a fashion designer about three years ago, I was mocked by my horse back riding instructor and her malicious mother. They actually laughed in my face when I responded to their question “What do you want to be when you get older?” That hurt a lot, and caused me to become so embarrassed. My self esteem and confidence level dropped considerably until later that night when I talked with my mom. My mom told me to let nothing stand in my way, and if that is what I really wanted it was attainable. She told me to look at Kerri (my horse back riding instructor) and see where she was; she lived at home with her parents, with no goals for the future except for her horses which weren’t going to take her far. She told me that anything was possible and to not be discouraged by ignorance. Ever since then I have stood behind my goals for the future even when people tell me that I won’t be able to do something. I try not to say “I can’t” because then you are just setting yourself up to fail. It is better to say “I can” and look positively at whatever is being undertaken.
I want to be a television broadcaster, whether it is for ABC News, or Good Morning America, I don’t care, but I have just got this passion to pursue that dream. This passion has probably been fueled by all the negative responses I get when I say that this is the job I want to follow, because their negative criticism just seems to make me want it more. I want to prove that I can achieve this dream, regardless of how competitive the field is and how difficult of a challenge it will probably be. This belief of anything is possible has been the needed motivator to helping me outline my future goals. I think it is important to live everyday with this idea in mind. I get discouraged a lot, and I know that a lot of my peers do as well. If you just keep your head up and go in with the mind set that anything can be accomplished, you can do it. Even though I am dreading going off to college and trying to make it in the world, my mom has instilled this idea in my head so that I can find the determination to succeed
Molly-
“You will wake up tomorrow and still be Molly Gondolf” I think that is so important for many people to recognize that no matter what happens, you are still the same person you were the day before. Life is filled with challenges, but we need to figure out how to work through them. People make mistakes and need to deal with the consequences, but it is not a big deal in the long run. Remembering that the world won’t end on a bad grade or lost game is especially vital for high school kids to remember because they always put so much stress on themselves when one thing goes wrong.
Goodness gracious. I can't write my thoughts on this blog for the life of me. Honestly this is my 5th time starting this bad boy. I know what I'm thinking, I just can't get it out in a coherent manner. What else is new?
Okay, so I was always that girl who stuck up for the kid being made fun of on the bus, or who spent time in the mentally challenged classroom, or who mentored the second grader whose father abandoned him- The goody-too-shoes who didn't have a mean bone in her body. That girl is not a ghost of my past, she is me, even today.
In the harsh world of high school, I have still managed to hold tight to my belief that everyone is special, and we all have feelings and a heart and mind and beliefs and morals. Yet everyday I find it harder and harder to display this side of me. Teenagers are so self-absorbed, so focused on their public image that it's impossible to reach the core of who they are. Therefore I find myself frustrated. How am I supposed to be me when there are very few "real" people left surrounding me? How can I still trust that we are all good deep down when there are people hurting me left and right? Girls I thought were my friends seem to ostracize me now. Suddenly I'm ignored and shoved to the side. What did I do? My boyfriend, who I have loved for 2 years suddenly treats me different, why? Even through all this I can't bring myself to hate these people. I can't just write them off like most people would. My heart still has room for them, should they want it.
I care deeply for others, sometimes too much. I'm so willing to get to know people, so open to conversation and communication. I get caught up in the little things. Like an unexpected smile from an old friend, or someone saying sorry for bumping into me in the hallway. I get it. We are who we are for a reason. And if you don't take time to understand someone's past, you don't know them. You never will. Being understanding and caring is so important in this world. The truth is we all need somebody to help us from time to time. And even if I have trouble displaying this core belief of mine, it is still a large part of the way I think. I refuse to judge people before I know them, and when someone is mean to me I work hard to give them the benefit of the doubt. I hold kindness near and dear to my heart.
I'm not perfect. I never will be. As long as I carry my core beliefs about the goodness of the individual and the power of empathy, I will become successful in my own eyes. I hope to carry this into adulthood, and find a job in the medical field that will appeal to this side of me. To be able to understand what people need, and help them become happier is all I want.
I hope that wasn't too confusing.
"This belief of anything is possible has been the needed motivator to helping me outline my future goals. I think it is important to live everyday with this idea in mind. I get discouraged a lot, and I know that a lot of my peers do as well. If you just keep your head up and go in with the mind set that anything can be accomplished, you can do it."
-Morgan Cullers
Morgan I really liked this quote from your blog. I agree with you, that "anything is possible." I admire your outlook and confidence on the subject. We do give up a lot, and it's important to keep striving for success.
Harleen Kaur
I can say that I hate listening to the radio. I don’t why but it never interested me. When I can listen to music or have a conversation, I wouldn’t listen to the radio. Not many people spend time on the question what the principles that guide you in your life. However no average working person has the time or even the will to think about any of the mind boggling question Blog questions that you present us with.
Although this question I have had the answer of for as long as I can remember. Many people believe in luck. They think that at time unexpectedly something wonderful or horrible can happen to them. Or, many people blame everything that went wrong on their “bad luck.” But how does someone get “bad luck” or “good luck.” Do you have to be a very bad egg. Well Hitler was a very bad demented egg and yet his “luck” was pretty good in the beginning but everything went downhill after that. But what is this “luck” that everyone wishes so dearly for. How is it achievable? Can anyone have it or are there pre or future requisites? Well I have an answer to all those questions. There is no such thing as luck. This was just a word created by superstitious idiots that were being modest about their discoveries.
In this world and in today’s day and age you have to make your own luck. Nothing is handed to you in this world. When you win the lottery the only reason you win the lottery is because you bought that ticket or picked random numbers and thought that you would because you were confident I yourself. This is the principle that I have been living by for the rest of my life. I know that I have had to make my own luck. If want something I know that I have to work for it. This world was, has been and will always be harsh and nothing will be handed to you on a silver platter.
Everyone in this class has to work for their grade. They have to study for each vocabulary test, they have read and re-read their essays numerous times, etc. And it’s not just for this class but for almost everyone class. People have to make their own luck. The only reason someone got an A on something is because they studied for they may have had prior knowledge or at least some knowledge on the subject. May be they have no knowledge but they may know some guessing techniques that could help them (ex. Sarah Crane got a better grade on the HN Geo. Midterm than me last year and I know she did not study she filled in C for the last 20 questions. She knew that this technique might work for her and it did.)
Nevertheless, in this big, bad, world people have to make their own luck. They have to work for everything they want. This one thing matters to me because I hate it when people say I get everything I want because I am lucky. But that wrong, people have to create the situation that to get everything they want for example some kids have to be really good at nagging their parents for money or anything else they may desire. I have no idea when I stumbled upon this belief but all I know is that it’s true and nothing can prove it wrong. Not even casinos because everything there is a game of chance an if the math is done correctly then any game can be won even slot machines. (ex. The amazing, and one of the best movies ever 21.)
Devon P
“I have still managed to hold tight to my belief that everyone is special, and we all have feelings and a heart and mind and beliefs and morals.”
--Devon P
I admire this quote because we are all humans. It doesn’t matter if some of us don’t at like it but it’s the truth. Everyone lives by morals and their own beliefs which represents individuality, which is the one thing that most teenagers struggle with today. No one can be themselves anyone because they are ashamed of liking something that everyone else hates. No wants to be on the other side but people need to know that individuality increase confidence. And confidence is one of the main qualities people need to have to survive in this world. Everyone has a voice but they just need to speak up and let others hear it.
Devie,
You always blow me away with whatever topic we are writing about. You are a genuinely kind, sweet and caring person-- don't ever let that go--because there aren't many people left with such a gift. Though I can definitely see how this characteristic helps you make decisions. You've even told me before how I make mean comments and don't even know it-- I consider this to be not such a good thing, but I can't seem to help it :(! I believe if I was more caring like you, I would think before I say things and realize it could hurt someone.
anyway, I realize I rambled on... sorry! you're the best, byeee!<3
It’s important to die wearing a fancy coat.
Children are the smartest form of humans in existence.
It only takes forty milliseconds to change the world.
Beauty is only a perspective.
Death can be used as proof that life is only an illusion.
Life becomes best once we picture the worst.
It would have to be the first idea, scribbled on a pale blue line of notebook paper in gray markings. While this may be considered a peculiar principle, I cannot take full credit for the idea of it. For this phrase was not first to enter my mind. Actually, it was thought of and spoken upon an accident; a misunderstanding. It is possible that this phrase may have coincidentally been spoken by Australian, book-carrying children coming home from school, scientists studying the depth of Antarctica, or perhaps by a red-lip-stick-wearing flapper in the mid-1920s. Yet, as far as I know, these words were first spoken just outside of the Pentagon, on a street corner with Macy’s just across the way. Its speaker was a tall, practically seven-foot tall high schooler with mad-scientist hair, always dressed in a long, black rain jacket. I had been standing near the group of friends he was talking with. In this group was a girl who you could easily picture spending the rest of her life looking through the varying objectives of a microscope at microorganisms. Another was a boy with seemingly Asian or Indian background who shared the same mad-scientist looking hair as the speaker. The other was also of Asian or Indian decent who reminded me of the kid in seventh grade who won the state spelling bee. The future-biologist girl was first to take the brief period of silence as an opportunity to begin a conversation. While facing away from me, I was unable to hear the words she spoke. Then, the speaker began to laugh saying, “Did you just say it’s important to die wearing a fancy coat?” “No,” she said laughingly, “I said…” and that was all I could hear. What an odd phrase I thought: It’s important to die wearing a fancy coat. It is from this misunderstanding which I was able to derive a guiding principle for my life.
It is my firm belief that everything is said and heard by particular people for a reason. While I do believe everyone must find their own reasoning for it, I believe nonetheless that there is a reason which exists. I may or may not have been the only one outside of this group to hear this phrase, and I may or may not have been the first to see it as having a deeper meaning. One way or another, its importance was probably far greater than the speaker would have ever thought. The things we say and do are often surrounded by many different mindsets, which judge and interpret these sayings and actions on a daily basis. It would be wrong to say that this is a false accusation because it justifies all of my other theories listed above.
I know that children are the smartest form of humans in existence because their perspectives are so different and unique from our own, which have already been to heavily influenced by logic and other’s opinions. It only takes forty milliseconds to change the world because this is the rate at which humans are able to detect fear in other people’s facial expressions. As a result, the entire world does not change within those forty milliseconds; those forty milliseconds just so happen to have the capability of changing the world. Beauty is only a perspective because the way we view beauty socially and through literature differs completely (there is no single definition). Death is proof that life is only an illusion because once people die, it’s like they were never fully in existence; they simply leave and we have no way of finding them. Lastly, life becomes best once you picture the worst because once you picture the worst that can happen, what actually happens is usually not the worst, which in turn makes it better. Things were said and things were done in order for me to reach such theories as I judged and interpreted them in different ways. We are all judgmental, but only to allow us to better understand our own views and beliefs.
Think of a coat. It offers us protection, and perhaps even a feeling of security. When you put the word “fancy” in front of it, many may begin to think of money, wealth, or prestige. I like to think of a fancy coat as simply being your favorite, or something you worked hard for. Maybe it’s that coat you wore every Christmas you went skiing, or that coat covered in patches from the different states you traveled to, or that coat you were given the first day you entered the armed forces and managed to bring home in one piece. Unlike the way someone else may see it, I don’t see it as being that Louis Vuitton fur coat you got your husband to spend his money on for you, or that coveted coat you stole from your sister and claimed never to have seen, or that coat Princess Diana was granted that you only wish you could lay your hands on. A fancy coat protects some of the greatest memories you’ve been given; it offers you the security of knowing that you lived life feeling proud of who you became.
It’s important to die wearing a fancy coat because it’s important to know that you lived life accomplishing your dreams, you shared some of the greatest memories you’ve ever experienced, and you lived life with a sense of fulfillment. It’s the way I want to look back at my life once it’s over. I understand that it happens to be one of the most frequently-written-about topics for me, but the more I write about it and the more I think about life in this way, the more I convince myself that it is what I really want. Usually, I write about how I want to travel the world and experience as much as possible, but as much as I fear taking this huge risk, it is something that I want for myself more than anything. Somehow I was able to take such a simple phrase as this, and interpret it in a way that I often think of most things as saying to me. This must be saying something about what I want out of life.
Just the other day, I was afraid to go shopping by myself in a different store than the one my little sister was looking in. How in the world can I possibly travel to other countries if I’m too afraid to go shopping by myself in a mall that I’ve already been to before? It’s impossible for me to express just how much I want to let go, and not have a care in the world. Sure I can dye my hair a different color and get as many tattoos as I want and buy as many airplane tickets as I can, but in the end, I want to know that I am satisfied with who I am; me. I want to know that I died wearing one of the fanciest coats I could ever dream of achieving. I want that more than anything. I don’t know how to get there, or what steps to take first, but perhaps the more I think about it and the more I write about it, the closer I will become to reaching that level. There is no way that I will gain the only coat I know I will be happy with if I allow my fear to dictate who I am. I seem so convincing through typed words, but completely different in person. So, I want to become the person scripted in these typed words. These words are coming from me, I just have to know that this is who I am. This is who I am. So, as I take this journey through my teenage years and into adulthood, I must never forget my guiding principle: It’s important to die wearing a fancy coat.
In response to Molly G:
Sometimes I wish I had Mr. Matlack as a teacher, even though I know for a fact that my grades would not be that appealing in his class. The guiding principle that you got from him and your swim coach, that you will wake up and still be the same person, can somehow be very difficult to remember when faced with failure. It’s strange because we know that we cannot always be perfect, and we know that mistakes will always be made. Yet, even so, when we don’t do as well as we expect or fail completely at a task that we prepared ourselves for, there is a part of us that changes. Sometimes we fail to see that such mistakes or “challenges that we face are minute, we will face bigger and better things in life,” as you stated. Your blog was very inspirational, and I’m pretty sure you answered it correctly. Who knows, I could be wrong, but it seems to me like you covered everything. Also, I must say that your blog was very well written and enjoyable to read.
“What’s meant to be will always find its way.” I couldn’t help but do the wrong thing and use this age-old aphorism because it truly sums up how I feel about my life and what guides me. I don’t think I could put it any better, but I’ll try to explain it a little further in my own words.
Whenever anything in my life seems to be going out of whack or down a different course than I had envisioned happening, I think, “it’s okay. It will all work out eventually,” to myself, and I immediately feel at least a little bit better. I believe that this is true for all people, that we all have a final destination, yet there happens to be many paths to follow that all lead to that same ending place. It is our choice to decide which way to go at the different forks in the road, but all roads will eventually lead to where we were intended to end up. You can take the long way home or the highway, but you’ll still get there in time.
I’m pretty sure that the reason I like to think this way is because it is something that I can always use as an excuse for something happening that, well, sucks.. That’s the bottom line. I wouldn’t say that I’m full of excuses or that I like to put the blame on others when things aren’t going my way, but by being able to say that it will all work out in the end, it’s like a means of justification for me. No one gets blamed, not even myself. It gives me hope that I will survive whatever hardships I happen to be facing. It goes the other way as well. When something just seems to fit, like a random occurrence that I didn’t see coming at all, I like to give these things a special chance to work out. Some of the best decisions I have made in my life were spur-of-the-moment and off the cuff. They were decisions that I couldn’t logically explain and would probably look terribly irrational on paper, but they worked out flawlessly and benefitted my life indescribably. Because of these things happening, I have become more convinced that things always work out in the end. I suppose that if they had all been horribly catastrophic decisions, I would have the opposite position on “fate.” I really don’t like to think of how I feel about life as “destiny” or “fate.” These words have a lot of connotative meaning that I really don’t like. I like to think of my guiding principle as a consequence of the butterfly effect or just how every decision affects something else which all leads to another thing that happens. This all sounds very crazy, but it is something that gives me a lot of peace in my life. I’m not the most spiritual person in the world, even though I do believe in God and such, so this belief gives me a way to forget about my stress and keep on living. If it all is going to work out how it was meant to in the end, why worry now? I still often worry, but only when I forget this little aphorism or when things are super super bad.
I’ve had to do a lot of thinking about my future recently, and therefore have been stressing. I can’t lie and say that I really am going to ONLY rely on “what happens was meant to be,” but I will use that as a way to get through it all. Of course I’ll use logic and go for my dreams, but I need something to give me a little faith in it all. This is where my beliefs come into play. That it will all turn out okay is something I tell myself almost daily. I try so hard, and try to be the best person I can be, so why should I not have an ending that is at least somewhat happy? This way, I know in advance that I most definitely will choose some brightly lit paths and maybe stumble upon a few dark ones as well, but it will all be ok in the end.
“Another thing I wanted to be was a stripper (not my proudest moment) but I can say that I was too young to know what a stripper was, I just wanted to be pretty and wear bikinis like the girls are on the sign did.”
Morgan,
Hahahah. So funny. :] But seriously, I was reading your blog and I thought to myself, “I would not be surprised if in a few years I see her next to Regis in the morning.” You made me believe in what you were saying about your “little engine that could” attitude. That’s something that I really need to apply to myself. The other night my mom told me that I should go to Princeton, and I literally laughed in her face. I thought about the people that went to Princeton, or those that were trying really hard to get in, and I couldn’t see myself as “that smart” or anything. I really have no desire to go there, but the fact that I could if I had wanted to was something I never really had considered seriously. You kind of reinforced that for me, and I really hope you become what you want! :]
On our seven minute trip to school every morning, my dad and I usually tune into NPR. It’s always the first thing you hear when you start the car and the radio blasts throughout the car. I honestly just cannot listen absorb NPR at 7 in the morning without dozing off, so after several minutes of that, my dad usually says, “Go ahead,” and I change that station to something more upbeat to awaken my tired mind.
But, anyways, I always question what guides me through my life. Is it pressure my parents? Peer pressure from my friends? My own low self-esteem? All three of these factors run constantly throughout my head whenever an important decision comes along. And honestly, I can never decide. Pleasing my parents generally means I’m not pleasing myself. Pleasing myself means I’m not making my parents happy, which in turn does not end up being so pleasurable after all. So, I just continue along with whatever my parents want just to make them happy and proud. And seventy-five percent of the time, they want more. They expect all these great things from me, and I just can’t give it to them. Probably because I frankly don’t want to anymore. All of my good deeds go unnoticed, so I question why I even bother. I wish I could be guided by the quote, “live life to the fullest.” I thought for some time that I did. I steadily realized however, that I don’t. If I was living my life to its fullest extent, I wouldn’t be doing my homework every night, I wouldn’t have to watch my weight all the time, soccer would never end. But here I am, doing my homework thinking it’s impossible to live to life’s greatest degree. I guess that’s what the weekends are for… But just recently, I stumbled upon a quote that states, “Your mistakes don’t define you; they remind you.” I contemplated over this for quite some time. I have done many things I regret, and probably numerous things I will regret in the future as well, but that’s what mistakes are for. They remind us of what we have done wrong, so as we do not do them again. We are taught about the holocaust, Nanking massacre in order to prevent such horrors from rising again. I am not defined by my mistakes. In fact, I don’t believe anyone is. I’m constantly reminded of mistakes I’ve made, and I’ve learned to grow from them. Realizing your mistakes helps you to become an overall better person. In the future, you’ll remember those mistakes you made and vow to never make them again. You aren’t defined by them. You just learn to grow and accept them.
Molly--
I really loved your blog and your quote. You couldn't have put it any better, and your quote is perfect. I won't exactly wake up tomorrow and be Molly Gondolf, but I still feel the exact same way. :)
Morg--
Your blog was very inspiring. Though I don't believe that anything is possible, your blog truly made me contemplate that. I hope you reach your dreams of becoming a TV broadcaster and not a stripper. :) kloveyou.
Now after a long time of thinking and overcoming painful headaches, I have finally come to a unanimous decision between myself and the little "me"s swimming up there, that I have finally got something. I won’t lie; it came to me while I was eating ice cream cake after the whole “portion patrol” thing in gym. You see, while I was chewing (that is if you can chew ice cream. I have no idea… o.o;), I was thinking about this blog and cursing life for this and what we did in class today. I’m sorry, Bunje, but those questions really took a lot out of me. It was while I was cursing life that I realized that I shouldn’t and then my beliefs just sat with me and discussed how bad it was to curse life. No, seriously. At the table was “Petunia” and “Lilith” talking to me about my beliefs. Yep, I’ve gone crazy. Hopefully I’ll make some more sense as I write this.
I believe in many things so it’s really hard for me to sum it up, but here goes...
“You have the choice to decide which is more important: to attain that one big happiness that comes every once in a while or to cherish the small daily happinesses instead. Do not feel discouraged, choose both. You see…life can be hard, sometimes it might even drive you insane, but it is unpredictable too, and if you make it, fun. Don’t drown in the rushing tides after tiring your arms to stay afloat. Rather, conserve your energy and drift with the wave and you will realize that your happiness wasn’t that far at all.”
That was long, but I couldn’t think of any other way to say it. What I’m trying to say is that life won’t come to you and pamper you with happiness. You have to run with it, race alongside it and reach out with open arms to embrace it, to dance with it. You have to want to throw away the bad and live in the good. I try to do that every day and it’s really satisfying!
Now, you must be wondering what I meant by “one big happiness” and “small daily happinesses.” Well, it’s really quite simple. Here I’ll explain it with my own personal examples.
Some of my small daily happinesses consists of snuggling with Teddy (yes, my teddy bear XP) in my warm, comfy bed, eating the greatness that is my dad’s cooking, taking a nice long shower after a long day, and talking with my mom when I finally see her. One of my more recent big happinesses has been participating in Cabaret Night and not completely failing at it. It was really fun!
Happiness can come in different forms and sizes and, if you enjoy life, it will become easier to see these happinesses (if that’s a word because Word says it isn’t). You will realize that you are surrounded by great opportunities rather than halting obstacles, by wondrous rewards rather than tasteless disappointments. This is what I like to call “Happiness that comes from appreciation” or “Happiness that comes from being alive.” It’s a magnificent privilege to live life the way I want! I love it!
However, many view this as worthless in today’s society and instead spend their time, cursing life, or rather, the bad things that have happened to them in their life. They stand still, alone, holding onto broken hearts and dreams. They are afraid at risking it all again. They don’t want to feel that same pain. Seeing all this around me, I realized that it is really easy to avert their eyes from all the great things they have, that it is really easy to turn away from the comforting hand that holds all the possibilities of success in order to avoid disappointment. Some people even believe that death is the only way to happiness. This is very unnerving and was one of the ways that helped me open my eyes.
I didn’t want to be that kind of person. I want something more from life. I want to be happy. In fact, I believe that it takes more to be depressed than happy. It really is a pain in the butt. Talking about being depressed! I have to stress the importance of this principle! It is very important to me as it keeps me from staying sad for too long. It keeps me from falling into depression. It keeps me from being a hindrance to myself and effectively stopping any advancement in my life. Imagine an Alice walking around with a constant frown and angry brows glued to her face. Imagine an Alice that doesn’t randomly go off talking about how you love her and hugging you to death. Imagine an Alice that sits there quietly, doing nothing.
That Alice, my dear friends, seems very boring to me.
What can you possibly get out of staying suspended in one place, one time? I love to have fun and look at everyday as a new slate to do something! Not one moment has been the same and I really appreciate that. While I do follow the same routine in school, I haven’t had two of the same kind of days yet. Even when I’m having bad days, they have distinct differences between them that set them apart. They have their own little happinesses throughout that day. One could end up with a gallon of ice cream while the other ends up with a big hug. You see, this way of thinking ends up making my life a whole lot more fun and that’s why I hold such beliefs close to me.
To be happy is a wonderful gift that requires nothing more than your own way of thinking.
El Fin.
I'll comment later. That killed me. @.@;
“What are your guiding beliefs?” or “What ideal would you like to lead you through life” seem like a simple enough questions, right? I mean we obviously decide our day-to-day actions based on our own personalized “core beliefs” and deciding which one should lead us into adulthood, would seem a rather easy task. Especially when we know who we are (well, okay maybe we don’t but we do have, at the very least, a slight outline, even if only paper-thin). But, in truth, it isn’t. Since this question was posted, I have been contemplating all of the possible “choices” I have to talk about, however, I have come the realization…I have yet to come up with one. Every time I think I might have an idea it slips away into the recesses of the my mind. It also doesn’t help when your life seems like it is spinning out of control and you no longer have a grip on anything and are merely riding the roller coaster, all alone I might add, that is your life while some, far-away, omnipotent, third person controls your life, telling it when to stop, start, slow down, and speed up. (Hey, alliteration!) But that is completely off topic and for another time. So, let’s trying thinking out loud, maybe that’s the cure for my, lack of a better phrase, brain-fart.
I guess the best place to begin is what I would do when I meet some complete stranger, or better yet, how or what I would think about them. I would, as I tend to do with everyone, unless given substantial reason not to, start him/her out with a clean/blank slate i.e. give him/her the benefit of the doubt. I would try to get to know him/her before passing any severe judgment that would cloud my opinion of them, meaning try my best to ignore gossip or other’s opinions while at the same time making sure to tread with caution when necessary. Well, it would seem to me that these two driving beliefs could probably be combined into one, amazing and awesome aphorism but, unfortunately, my brain is on vacation somewhere, hopefully in the tropics, where is beautiful and serene, but I have this feeling it is in Alaska, fighting off polar bears. So, instead, in a less-than-eloquent style, I will try to sum it up: “Don’t allow others’ prejudices to blind you from the truth, however, don’t let the truth be blinded just because you have no desire to comfort it.”
Now, of course, I am surely you are all dying of anticipation and wondering how in the world I arrived at this particular belief and why it is so important, the latter of which I will answer first.
Since first grade, I have always been singled out as “the smart one” or “the good one” or, in the words of an eight-year old, a “Mr. Goody-Two-Shoes Smarty Pants”. This, while rarely evident by my actions, moods, and self-esteem level, greatly impacted and haunted me; it still does to this day. People didn’t even give me a chance to prove my worth or even consider that I could possibly be a “bad seed”, which, when I did something wrong or didn’t get a 100 on the test, seemed as if the whole world was collapsing. My castigation was not swift or did it fade away quickly, it was a long and demoralizing stare or few words of disappointment such as, “I’m really disappointed in you, you should have known better” or “Why did you get a 96?” all of which were followed by a cold piercing stare that literally cut my heart into pieces and I felt like I had committed a crime, at the age of 8! And the sad thing is, it still happens today. All my mom seems to care about is my GPA and class rank. Ever since I told her who the top five were she is constantly bugging me about how I did on a test usually followed by how did so-and-so do? When I told her I got and 86 in history she about nearly had a heart attack. It seriously took a good half and hour to explain that it wasn’t bad, it only counts for 10% of my overall grade, and explain, as Ms. Bunje has said, class rank is one of the lowest things on the list for colleges. She was only convinced of the last when I told her that Maya, who was not Valedictorian, got into Princeton for only $20 a year. Even then, however she wasn’t completely won over. But the point of all this is, if there were no expectations, or prejudgments, life could be so less stressful and people who are normally ignored could finally have there time to shine.
I am sure I am not the only one who resents having to life up to the “good one” or the “smart one” title, sometimes I wonder what it would be like, if only for a day, if I did what I actually wanted, without having to fear repercussions. I wonder if I would still embody that character, the “Mr. Goody-Two-Shoes Smarty Pants”. Oh, to just be fear, and start anew…that is where my own guiding principle comes into play.
The ideal I wish to follow through my entire life is to allow every individual to show the character they truly want to be without forcing one upon them. This goes for good and bad alike. There are people out there who have crappy lives and, as a result, do stupid things. However, does that mean I should turn my back to them or give them the cold shoulder? I think not. Everyone deserves at least a second chance, if not a million (under certain circumstances); we are all human and make mistakes, which often seems to be forgotten. Of course that doesn’t mean that I feel rapists, murders, and the like should be given a “get out of jail free” card. But the reason, in my eyes, that the repeat offense rate is so incredibly high is because these people, after being released, have no one who will care for them and they feel they have nothing to loose. If we could just manage to overlook, not forget (key difference), that black smug on their life and try to get to no the real “them” then I think the world would be an amazing place. Same for good people, when they make one mistake, it is as if they killed the Pope, the president, and some other prolific person whose title begins with a “p”.
At the same time, however, if you know someone can do better, try to gently explain to them that they can do better, if they choose to ignore then that is there problem, but, as stated before don’t let the truth be blinded. Same for “evildoers”. While you shouldn’t jump to the immediate conclusion that a teenager who committed a theft is going to steal your brand, spanking new iPhone, don’t blind yourself to the all-real possibility. Overall, don’t hold someone’s past actions in the forefront of your mind but don’t let them slip into the dark recesses either; there needs to be a happy medium.
It would seem rather redundant to explain why this particular belief is one I so wish to encompass, but for the sake of redundancy, I shall. I don’t want to become one of those people I feel completely wipe out anybody’s chance at a second start. I want to be an open-minded individual and judge people mostly on their here-and-now, however impossible it maybe. I want to be able to look back when I am old and proudly say that I gave everyone I encounter a fair chance and a fresh start (At least with me). But most of all, I want to help create a feeling of unity that can only be achieved when everyone learns to appreciate others, which can only happen if we first get to know each other without predispositions clouding our minds.
“Laugh more than you cry and compliment more than you complain.”
“Appreciate who you’ve become through your trials and tribulations.”
Each of these are important principles in my life and as well as others, but they are so cliché. Over these I’ve contemplated, trying to think about whether they are truly that important to me. Finally, I came up with what I believe affects me a lot, especially right now.
For my entire life, I’ve been forced to think about the ‘future’. My teachers, coaches and parents especially have been encouraging me figure out what I want to do with the rest of my life ASAP. As if I even know now, nonetheless then! But really, what is the future? It’s not tangible, so I suppose that’s what makes it hard for people to grasp. Doesn’t each of us have different futures? Whatever. My point is that I realize the future is always going to come, but what happens in the future can be determined now. And I believe ‘living in the NOW’ is an important principle in my life that I make sure I live by.
Almost every junior and senior I know is freaking out about the future. Getting into college, especially. And I can’t deny that I’m one of them. But what they fail to realize is, they shouldn’t worry so much about the future itself, but what they are doing now to shape and/or create their desired future. Every choice and move we make will affect us somehow later down the line. Knowing you made a good decision can ultimately erase the fear of the unknown and make you feel more secure about what is going to happen next. Now is the time to be making those important decisions to ensure that we are on the right track.
For instance, a number of peers I interact with think that ‘slacking off now and buckling down in college’ is an easy path to take into their futures. However, if they understood that the effort they put in now, in high school, will ultimately determine where their life is headed (generally speaking) most wouldn’t be choosing to slack off. Because I know how important the choices I make now are, I make sure to put my best effort in everything I do. By the decisions I make in athletics, academics and whatever else I set my mind to, the path to my future should be an easier road to find.
Any and all the principles we live by are generally abstract ideas, but I’ve tried my best to describe the one that is most important to me. I realize each of us finds ourselves in situations where we wish we had handled it differently or done it better, especially when having to do with what I just described, myself included. But if I ensure to keep this basic principle in mind, I can continue on my journey into adulthood with more confidence than ever.
Alice:
Your response is AMAZING! I really wish i had an ounce of your poeticness (<-Portmanteau Word??). It really boggled my mind, the simplicity of it all. It is a great ability to have, making life fun.
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I will comment some more tomorrow :)
I consider myself quite the pessimistic sometimes. Actually, I am the majority of the time as horrid as that is. I wish I could say that my guiding principles are “live your life to the fullest” or “everything will work out in the end.” But quite frankly, when I evaluate my past experiences and the emotions that have come along with them, I can’t say I feel that way at all. But I can whole-heartedly say that I highly admire many of you who have the ability to live your life in such a manner.
As for me, after reminiscing on my past for quite sometime, I could think of one principle that I know I live by everyday, which is “it is always better to forgive and not hold a deep grudge inside you. With this, you will feel more at peace.” This isn’t very easy. It usually takes a decent amount of time for me to run back to this belief, but I always eventually do. I just don’t believe that holding a grudge can do any good for anyone. When I get into a fight or argument with a friend, it’s hard for me to remain that way with that person. Because here I am, one friend less, so what now? All I can do is forgive unless I can truly be happy moving on with my life without that person. Needless to say, I don’t want anyone to think that I will automatically forgive a person’s mistakes. It takes time and actual conversations to work things out.
You might wonder, “Well, if someone did something awfully terrible to you like killed your family or someone you loved dearly, would you be able to forgive them?” It’s hard for me to determine that. This circumstance could obviously change my values, just as all circumstances can. But I think yes, I eventually could. Not really because I wanted to, but because I had to… in order to move on. That’s something I would like to discuss a little more. It is never easy for me to forgive. A part of me never wants to. Because I always wonder, “Why do I have to be the bigger person? I’m sick of it.” But, it’s hard for me to explain. I never feel quite complete until I do. And that incompleteness leads me to saddened state. And I think that partial emptiness in me has to do with the fact that I don’t like losing my friends or anyone that I care about. By holding a grudge, it’s like you’re not allowing that relationship between your friends to be mended. And that’s just heart wrenching to me.
I’ve actually come to realize all this a few months ago after forgiving one of my friends for his mistakes once again… And the thoughts that ran through my mind consist of all those I have mentioned before. And though there are doubts in my mind on whether I should forgive or not, it’s usually always worth it in the end. Because it helps me realize that I am indeed the “bigger” person. And it helps me realize that I am a god damn good person and I should never think otherwise about myself even in the lowest of times.
It’s probably true that I forgive because I care too much not to. And I’m not quite sure if this principle is a flaw of mine or not. But I do know that it has shaped me into the person that I am at this moment.
Devon- “Even through all this I can't bring myself to hate these people. I can't just write them off like most people would. My heart still has room for them, should they want it.”
This is exactly how I feel. And you really nailed it in those three amazing sentences. Partially, why I tend to forgive people and not remain with hatred is because my heart still has room for them too. And I could never write off any of my friends either because there are so many memories and words left unsaid. I think the principles that you live by Dev really shows the great person that you are.
I never really think about why the principles I live by came about. I have certain beliefs that I hold dear and true, but I never think about, nor care, why I believe that way.
There are some things I'll simply never do. Drugs are one of them. I also would never get completely trashed around large groups of people or people I don't know. And I don't believe in sex until marriage or until I'm absolutely positive I'm ready. These things come to me by common sense. Why would I want to do drugs if they're so harmful? Why would I want to risk drinking and being out of control around people I don't know? Why would I want to turn myself into a slut or feel pressurized into doing things I don't want to do?
But other times my beliefs come through because I over-analyze every little thing, that I tend to get either too stressed or too scared to do what I was even considering.
Some beliefs are because I believe in Karma and am extremely superstitious. For example, my friend and I stole a really pretty towel from some person's lawn in the summer, a couple weeks later we got robbed and I lost $250. Karma? Oh yes. Now, my superstition comes in because I normally go through the same routines days on end, otherwise I think I'm going to die or something if I change the way I live. This is kind of why I rarely go out places and rarely want to risk having fun, because I think if I have too much fun, things will soon go really bad. Just like I think I'm probably going to die soon because I've been winning a lot of concert tickets on radio contests and shit, and my sister and I just won $500 from the Super Bowl. So since all this strange "luck" has been bestowed upon me, it's all going to backfire because people are not allowed to have that many goods things happening to them. So in part, some of my beliefs and principles are based on fear.
I wouldn't say that schooling, parents, or CCD (when I went) molded any of my beliefs. I simply believe things because they're what I want or don't want out of life.
I could make up some little sayings that might come close to conveying how I live… actually no I can't. Anything I can think of, I feel has already been said because I've probably already heard or read it before, so it's probably not original. I do tend to talk to myself and give myself advice in certain situations, like "Jen, you're better than this," or "Jen, just do what you want," or "Jen, don't follow your heart or instincts, just think things through." But those all suck.
The way I live my life by can be best expressed in lyrics. Ziggy Marley says it best,
"Just do what you feel and don't you fool yourself, I say.
'Cause I can't make you happy unless I am, I say I say.
I got to be true to myself."
That's basically what I do. I stay true to myself. I am what I am. From what I've either gone through, witnessed, or heard about, my reasoning creates my opinions which add on to the multiple principles I live by.
My favorite part of that quote is "just do what you feel and don't you fool yourself". It's important to me to follow and act on my beliefs. Believing in them doesn't mean anything if I prove to be a hypocrite. I can't pretend that for "just this one time" my principles can be disregarded and so it's fine if I behave differently. I'd only be fooling myself and going against not only what I stand for, but who I am.
I've never exactly lived in the moment. I'm either stuck in the past or focused on (or well, fearing) the future. Because of this all my actions and beliefs are because of past experience or what's best for my future. Most of what I do is to make sure when I'm older, no matter how much I'll have dreaded growing up and changing, I'll have done the best I could to make sure I'm happy, somehow. "'Cause I can't make you happy unless I am." This fits because I have to focus on making myself happy before I'm even capable of making others. So most of what I do is best for me, that way I can slowly try and live my life the right way. Why get others caught up in my lifestyle if I barely want to live it?
See, I'm also one that takes people's feelings into great consideration… most of the time. I rarely blatantly verbally abuse someone or ridicule people for no reason. I'm not saying I don't, I'm sure as hell no saint. But the times that I do it's usually because it's in my best interests to make sure they know I don't like them so they can stay out of my life and/or my way.
Ugh, I think I did this blog wrong.
The second example is one that my mom always would recite to me, along with grade school teachers. It’s one that I feel like I live my life by and is the reason why I have come so far in the endeavors I pursue. Besides this belief, courage is needed to pursue anything and to reach anywhere. As a little girl, I stood right by my mother’s side. It was almost as if she was all I really had growing up. She gave me the stability and security I needed and nurtured me with love and as much honesty that I could handle. However whenever there was something wrong, I never had the courage to stand up and speak. I could easily have the courage to just quietly observe and listen to others, but I never had the uumph to actually voice my opinion that I felt strongly about. I was always so intimidated and as my grandfather has said I was quite timid with not the least amount of moxy that my mother has. Instead, I was very calm and serious at the same time like my father was. When my mother started realizing how I started to become a push over and never controlled my life, but allowed others to influence me so heavily, she immediately got angry at me and had a talk with me. My stepfather and mother always illustrated to me what standing up for yourself and how you feel can reward you whether it brings feeling of accomplishment or helping someone. Little by little instead of sitting in the corner of my mind, I verbally sought out what I really thought. For a while, my thoughts came out of my mouth rapidly in a jumble mess. Sometimes, it still is a jumble mess depending on how thorough I really analyze the topic. Now more than ever, I’m in control of how I think and speak. This belief of having courage and confidence to do so, has led me the ability to talk to authority, managers, and even my parents with no doubt in my words. The first step to becoming strong is ultimately believing in yourself by having the courage and confidence to do so. This is the strongest belief I hold. I believe in promises. I believe in second chances. I believe in never holding grudges. I believe in approaching people like chapter books. I believe in letting go easily, but holding on tightly when needed. I believe in keeping your chin up and your smile wide in any situation. I believe in optimism. I believe in myself. The “I believes” are really redundant. Through time, you can truly recognize anything. It’s all about your life experiences that teach you a variety of lessons to be learned. All of these beliefs are important, especially the promises one because promises go hand in hand with trust. Trust is needed. It’s a foundation as beliefs are, too.
Hayley:
"But just recently, I stumbled upon a quote that states, “Your mistakes don’t define you; they remind you.” I contemplated over this for quite some time. I have done many things I regret, and probably numerous things I will regret in the future as well, but that’s what mistakes are for. They remind us of what we have done wrong, so as we do not do them again. We are taught about the holocaust, Nanking massacre in order to prevent such horrors from rising again. I am not defined by my mistakes. In fact, I don’t believe anyone is."
I think this is a new quote that I love. I wish everyone thought this way, but unfortunately most people reflect on others with the horrible things that they have done in the past. We get judged on our mistakes constantly by people we may not even talk to. Mistakes should only serve as a reminder, since what's in the past is exactly the past.
“You will realize that you are surrounded by great opportunities rather than halting obstacles, by wondrous rewards rather than tasteless disappointments. This is what I like to call “Happiness that comes from appreciation” or “Happiness that comes from being alive.” It’s a magnificent privilege to live life the way I want! I love it!”
Alice, I think that statement is very inspiring. People always look at the negatives in life. They dwell on what could have happened, what should have happened. While they are dwelling on the past, they missed out on the amazing opportunities that have passed by. And it is great that you want that kind of happiness! I think we all want some of it! Great blog, loved it, loved it.
Molly!
Any single word (or weird noise) that slips out of the lips of Mr. Mattlack I hold to the highest. He gives such amazing advice and is always right in everything that he says. I've honestly grown to love the man despite how meticulous he is about every little thing. I love all his analogies and quotes. I am so proud to say he was one of my teachers.
Morgaaan Cullers AKA Persiannnn
I love how we both wanted to be the same thing when we were little :p too bad you moved on! hahahah JUST KIDDING. I'll see you on TV girl. Just flip over a few channels to 45 and you can watch me wrangle a lion cub (because i couldnt possibly handle anything bigger haha)
I’m going to try my hardest not to be terrible cliché, but it is going to be a challenge.
Something I firmly believe and fully embrace throughout life is everyone deserves to be heard. There are a million stories out there, and with that two sides to each of those stories, and by not listening to the people around us we miss opportunities to learn and grow. Every soul has something to say. Also, every person has a journey. No matter how long or short that journey may be the stories they hold could be another person to key. Stories and learning go hand in hand. When you are a toddler those stories are fairy tales and as you grow older they become the stories of those around you. Whether you listen to the home wife whose excitement came from her heart or it’s the person that traveled the world a story is golden from whoever it comes from. Not only do I use this statement as learning from the things around you that you should be engaging in, I also take it that every soul should have a chance to plead their case. I feel every person should have someone to go to when times get rough. I feel every person should have at least two ears that they can gab to for hours and hours and know they are truly being heard. When people talk they are not doing it to taste the air! They are talking because they have something to say that is important, because if it wasn’t important they wouldn’t be putting the time to tell you it. If they didn’t mean they wouldn’t say it. This isn’t always case, but I like to people the benefit of the doubt. Every story needs to be heard, and every person a voice. I am most sad that not everyone uses their voice to their full capability and I feel that it’s not fair that voices have to be suppressed. I would rather talk to someone for three hours about whatever is bothering them, no matter how little the cause, and then let them just think about it in their own head. Things get lost in our own heads, we tend to overanalyze and get too involved in the problem because it is our own problem. I wish everyone was so open to not just their friends. Last year our summer assignment was to listen to someone else’s story and write about it. I picked my uncle and I realized that man that I barely knew had led such an exciting life and realized if you don’t like the lot you’re given, change it. I think all listening is important, no matter how small a comment is or a feeling it’s still a feeling in the end. Some peopled need a different form of expression not everyone can paint a picture or dance be happy about it. Some just need to talk it out, but the problem is there aren’t enough true listeners in the world that will honestly just whole heartedly listen anymore. It is such a “me” society and to be honest I would much rather look out for someone else. I think it is important to listen to everyone you met, and everyone problems because you never know what you will learn. Nor, will you ever get to experience life from someone else's eyes. I know the more I listen the more I grow and the more I realize I am never truly alone. I think it’s really important that we never feel alone. Stories are better than any antidote money can buy, whether by telling one or listening to one.
Morgan -
I really loved your blog this week the entire thing, your story about wanting to be a stripper totally inspired me :] I think you will make an amazing broadcaster and i'm really happy that i'm friends with you this year. I think you would make a great fashion designer, broadcaster, anything you want to be i know you can do it and be amazing at it.
Molly-
Your blog was also very inspirational. At the end of the day strip away the bad grades the troubles and the heartaches and your still going to be you. And that is a scary but very comforting thought. No matter what at the end of the day your still you, and t he people that love you love you for exactly that. Now thats a story that should be told a million times over. Happy birthday, and i love you.
I am who I am and no one can change me unless I allow them to. I have ideals and virtues but I would be lying if I said they didn’t change. I can’t always be the same. It wouldn’t be fair to myself. Change allows for new experiences to come forth, for me to be the person that I want to be. But I can’t exactly pin point all my morals. As corny as it seems I just listen to my conscious and I go from there.
In saying that I’d like to add that I love quotes. I just think that they are so amazing and can relate to what you wish to say in a way that you never thought of writing it yourself. So I was flipping through our agenda book today like I usually do when I’m bored in school and I put a big red or green heart and all the quotes I liked. Yes the agenda book actually holds quotes. I picked some to share with you. This is what I believe.
I keep my ideals, because in spite of everything I still believe that people are really good at heart. – Anne Frank
I’m a good person who never gives up on people, unless they were meant to leave, so I hope that in return people never give up on me.
Happiness doesn’t depend upon who you are or what you have; it depends upon what you think. – Dale Carnegie
I am happy by choice because there is no need in making the rest of the world depressed. Smiles are good for you. Spread them around.
Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were when they gave up. – Thomas Edison
I give up on myself sometimes especially when it comes to math but I know it’s not fair to myself and to the people that want to see me succeed so I shall try and try again.
Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen. – Winston Churchill
I know how to shut up but I’m not the best speaker in the world so I hesitate to speak up. But I will master this eventually.
Discoveries are often made by not following instructions, by going off the main road, by trying the untried. – Frank Tyler
I may not always get the reaction I wanted but it’s worth a shot to get my thoughts out there as random as they seem because you might discover that something seemingly weird is completely rational and creative. In some instances your discovery way even be a new friend. =)
Tootleleedodedo!
Hey Devon
I liked your blog. Short and sweet.
This was my favorite part.
"I'm not perfect. I never will be. As long as I carry my core beliefs about the goodness of the individual and the power of empathy, I will become successful in my own eyes."
I completely agree with you. As long as I continue to hold my ideals I will have led a good life.
It's funny that this principle is meant to be the one to guide us into adulthood. After a fair amount of contemplation, I've found that that single principle I want to keep with me through my life is "Never grow up". It's really nothing too complex. I suppose as I get older, there will be more mature things I will begin to enjoy, but I've seen a lot of what adulthood has to offer, and none of it compares to the sorts of things I've already encountered in life.
The simple up and down motion on a seesaw, the childish humor of cartoons, the basic fun of stacking blocks, anything I might really need to get through life I got before reaching thirteen. Really, I'm not sure when i became aware of the importance of this to me. I suppose it happened around the time I realized I was too big to play in the McDonalds Playplace. I was certainly young enough to be playing in there at that point. At that point I realized my childhood was rushing past too fast. In early high school, the only channels I watched with any regularity were nickelodeon and cartoon network. (Eventually I slipped into watching only what recorded on the tivo, and now I watch no Tee Vee at all. That's not the point, however.)
The simple fact is that most of the happiest times in my life were when I was a child, playing little games or with one of those generic little building kits. As kids, we regarded everything with a sort of wonder that made everything seem magical. As we grow older, we look back on that feeling and wonder why nothing anymore seems magical. Sometimes I think it's just nostalgia, but every now and then, something amazes me. It seems incredible, and for just a second, that sense of magic returns. That feeling is what I'm after.
The one thing I'm looking to get out of life is happiness. I know it sounds selfish. There is nothing, however, I can think of that would be better to have than happiness. If I was given three wishes, I would only use one, because that wish would be for all beings to experience bliss and contentment for all eternity.
It's funny. Maybe it's just my natural laziness, but I have a tendency to find simple answers to complex problems. Life is simple. Everything is governed by basic technical rules. My primary objective is to secure happiness for myself. My secondary objective is to provide happiness for others. My final objective is to fight batman and win without breaking a sweat. Nothing ups your street cred more than serving a beatdown to batman.
But my first two goals are the important ones. Using my knowledge of the rules of the world, I intend to work towards them.
To Matty W!!!
WHERE WERE YOU?!? ARE YOU SICK!?! >/////< YOU WORRY ME!!!
Ahem... yes, now to talk about your blog.
First off, I can totally understand what it must've been like to have that reputation as the "goody-two shoes." I can actually understand both sides of the coin as I used to a be a bad kid when I was younger. XP But yeah, it must've been really really hard to placate your mom over history. Believe me, my parents were the same way, except now they don't really do anything about it anymore. I hope you will have the same thing happen. I think she holds you in high regard and see you as impeccable from what I've read.
"Same for good people, when they make one mistake, it is as if they killed the Pope, the president, and some other prolific person whose title begins with a “p”."
Haha, I love how you bring humor into a serious blog. It always makes it fun to read.
As for your beliefs, I can only say one thing: You are not a devil on the inside! If you ever think you are inwardly evil, you are not! This just proves it. You genuinely believe in giving people second chances, in caring for them when they don't have anyone else to. You are a wonderful person, Matt, don't let anyone (or yourself) tell you otherwise!!!
Overall, your blog is always a pleasure to read. ^_^ *applause*
Oh, and if you really are sick, again, get well soon! I missed you today!
To Hayley:
I completely agree when you say that nobody is defined by their mistakes. As long as you're able to pick yourself up off the ground after falling down. That's something important for everyone to remember. it's kept me going a few times.
To Molly:
"But it was the talk that Mr. Matlack gave us in class today that really got me thinking. After we got our abysmal midterms back, he said that our grade does not reflect who we are as a person. We will still wake up tomorrow and be the same person we are today. If something amazing happened to us, a fat head isn’t necessary, because we are still the same person we were before the event that changed our life. If something bad happened, brush it off, because you will wake up tomorrow, and still be you. You just need to strive to do better next time."
I remember that! I like how you took that and twisted it into your own belief. Guess Chem isn't all just numbers and formulas, huh?
First off, I want to say that you're an amazing swimmer! XP Don't be so hard on yourself! You're really fast!
Secondly, I really liked your blog and it really inspired me. You're right. When we wake up tomorrow, we are ourselves. Changes and all do affect what we become, but overall, we can always sum ourselves up with our name, no matter what. "Molly" may become an Olympian, but will stay the same person that stares into the mirror every morning. Results shouldn't affect us too much. *applause* Kudos!!!
"I believe in the sand beneath my toes,
The beach gives a feeling, an earthy feeling...
I believe in the faith that grows
And the four right chords can make me cry..."
-SemiCharmed Kind of Life, Third Eye Blind
So, I know that posting a song is usually meg's thing, but whatever, this is my FAVORITE song and it pertains to the blog. So there.
*TAKES TWO HOUR BREAK TO PLAY IN THE SNOW :)*
More than anything, I guess, I believe that life is meant to be lived.
*TAKES SECOND BREAK TO WIN eBAY AUCTION*
Woo! I won!!!
Please wait while I do my victory dance.
Okay, now back to the blog.
Like I was saying, I believe that life is meant to be lived. By this I mean that I do what I want as often as I can. Now this is not to say that I do what I want all the time. For instance, I will frequently help my little sister with her homework. Do I want to help her with her homework? Hell no, because whenever she asks for help, she really just waits for me to give her the answer straight out, and getting her to actually learn anything is like trying to give a cat a bath. It’s necessary, but neither party really wants to be doing it, scratching will probably be involved, and eventually somebody is going to get their eyes clawed out. I help my little sister because, besides the fact that I love her and don’t want her to fail, doing so benefits everybody. Being selfish all the time is bad for the soul, and besides which, it’s boring. But I still do all I can to enjoy myself and live my life the way I want to. For instance, even though I have a crapload of homework, I’ll still go outside and have a snowball battle royale with my little brother. After all, I’m always getting homework. Homework will still be there when I come back, but snow will melt, and my little brother won’t be little and fun much longer. In the grand scheme of things, a snowball fight will mean so much more to me in my life than an Algebra II packet. I always try to ask myself, Will I regret this later? And yes, I know this is a ginormous unforgivably corny cliché, but I listen to my heart for the answer. If I had only one principle to govern my life, this would be it.
Another principle I live by is the thought that everything works out for me in the end. A narcissistic concept, I know, but so far all my experience has proved it correct. If I lose an ebay auction, I find an identical item on ebay a few days later and win it for about twenty dollars cheaper. If I win a free fishing trip but don’t catch a single fish, I win the raffle for a second free trip plus a free fishing pole. If I completely space on a government assignment, the due date is magically pushed back a week. If I get into a fight and the Mullica principal phones my parents, it is only to tell them what an emotionally sensitive yet wonderfully brave and intelligent child I am (true story; Mr. Dougan did say those things, Ms. Ottinger commended me for taking a stand against bullying, and only the school guidance councilor was slightly concerned that I might have “anger issues,” an idea my parents just laughed off because the guidance councilor was this ridiculous woman who asked everybody that came through her office if they had “anger issues.” Actually, all of these things are true stories). Even the bad things that happen to me ultimately work out for me, making me a stronger and better person.
For anybody who watches Scrubs, you might remember that Todd the extremely unintelligent and high-five obsessed plastic surgeon once said, “If it doesn’t hurt, you’re not doing it right.” This is probably the only smart thing Todd has said in all of Scrubs many seasons. And although Todd was talking about something completely different than what I mean, in a way, he was right. The best things in life always do require a little pain (like my leg is KILLING me from when I smashed it against the wooden grape arbor in our backyard during the snowball fight) but the pain, and the effort required, is always worth it in the end.
Last, but not least, I believe in always being prepared. I have about five million things in my purse, like bandages, a German phrasebook, a flashlight, a threadcutter, a bouncy ball, and a toy car. I know that these may seem random and pointless, but you never know when a bouncy ball might come in handy, or when a wind-up toy car could be crucial in distracting Russian militants long enough for you to make your escape. Likewise, you never know when a piece of information or a particular skill could be needed, so learn anything and everything, remember where the pressure points are located on the human body, and if you overhear a group of tattooed mercenaries discussing how best to kill you and make it look like an accident, for god’s sake at least arm yourself before you go charging in to rescue your puppy.
Harleen,
Of course me putting all "C" for the last 11 (it was less than 20) questions wasn't luck. I ran out of class time, everybody was packing up to go home, and I remember a substitute once say that C is the most used number in multiple choice, and the one to go with if you had no idea what the real answer was. So of course I quickly filled in C for the last 11 questions. It was better than leaving them blank. But it was pretty lucky that seven out of those eleven actually was C, right? I mean, Ms. Cathy could have easily chosen any of the other four letters. I do believe that luck exists, and that some things are beyond our control. However, I believe that, for the big things in life, the decision is ours.
"Well, it would seem to me that these two driving beliefs could probably be combined into one, amazing and awesome aphorism but, unfortunately, my brain is on vacation somewhere, hopefully in the tropics, where is beautiful and serene, but I have this feeling it is in Alaska, fighting off polar bears."
Matty W can I just say how much I adore this one line? It's just an amazing line.My family likes to joke that my brain goes on vacation every summer, but I imagine that air fare for your brain was much cheaper, since it went in the winter and I hear that ticket prices jump in the summer seasons.
No, I've never thought about what the guiding principles in my life are. I mean, not before the blog I hadn't. After I read the blog on Sunday night, I did think about it though. And I thought about it on Monday. I thought about it on Tuesday. Here's what I came up with:nothing. So I forced myself to think about it once again, all day today, in hopes of stumbling upon something. I even hoped an encounter with a situation might make me realize what the "guiding principle of my life" is. But of course, I got nothing. Alot of random little beliefs did occur to me that I have, but none imortant or significant enough to devote 450words to. So Wednesday night, I sit in the ACCC library, with a vague idea about what I'll say, but still not completely sure of what my answer is. I'm hoping something will come out of it while I write.
Something that I have always tried to do, and will always do and believe everyone should do is to keep a good relationship with friends and family, and always make time for them: never allow anyone to drift away from you, or any petty little thing/arguement break off your relationship. So I guess that's my guiding principle:
" The best thing a person can do throughout their life is to maintain a good relationship with their friends and family, and always make time for them.Never break off ties beause of an absurd reason."
What is a person if he stands alone, with no on standing behind him? To support him? Give him a reason to live? To give him a reason to smile, laugh and to live? He is nothing.
Every person needs their family and their friends standing behind him and supporting him. I was having a conversation with my friend about a week ago, and we were looking for random topics to discuss, so I asked him what made him happy most of the time, and while I waited for his answer, MY answer to the question popped up in my head without me even having to think about it. He answered the question, and sure enough, his answer was the same as mine, "my friends." I then asked him what made him really sad most of the time, and while he gave me an answer, I failed to come up with one myself, because I realized that I was hardly ever sad. I could not think of a time in the past months that I have been sad. Now, why is this? I thought...It did not take long to figure out the reason for my constant bliss: I have WAy too many things to be happy about. I have too many people around to distract me even if I were sad, and to make me smile regardless. Way too many people give me a reason to smile throughout the day. Whether it's my family, or my friends from school,friends outside of school, or teachers, or the people I go to church with, I am surrounded by people who just give me a feeling of contentment just because they're there, and I couldn't possibly find time to be sad. So I figure since I'm always so elated now,when I have a great family and great friends, If I keep everyone around, then I will be gleeful forever:)
Leonor:
"I give up on myself sometimes especially when it comes to math but I know it’s not fair to myself and to the people that want to see me succeed so I shall try and try again."
well said, (and I hope that you did say that, and I didn't mistake a quote for something you said). So if in fact those ARE your words, I know where you're coming from. I'm not great at math and have also given up on it in the past, but my mom never let me, so I had to get back on track with it a few times
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
This is the Serenity Prayer, and though it started out a Christian prayer, it has since then became a sort of secular mantra that has for a long time been used by AA for recovering alcaholics.
Now, I can't put my finger on exactly which blog it is, or why, but for some reason this blog and most of the blogs I've read have made me think of this AA prayer. It's strange, but it's a good thing to live by, I think.
The main principle I live by- per se- is that no matter how hard you try to change it, you will be what you are, you will be who you are, and you will experience what you set yourself up to experience. I came across this initially by how I was raised and I built onto that as I grew older and learned more about life.
What I believe, you see, is that a person’s personality is set. Yes, they may change the vocabulary or tone they choose to speak in, change their clothes, or their hair, but a hint of who you really are will always show through; you just have to look. There are two types of people the people who die their hair crazy colors or shout out when they disagree with a statement or, there are those that wish they could die their hair or shout out, but feel that they can’t, they feel like society would disagree. If personality is what I think it is then those people would be equivalent, despite their two different masks. That is what I mean by who you are.
By what you are, I mean are you the devoted type? Social? Attention seeking? Whatever you may be, you stay “that”. This is not to say you do not mature and act a little differently, your character is always going to stick. I hope that’s different than personality, because when I think of it- it is.
As for the experience what you set yourself up for, I’m essentially alluding to the idea of karma. If you were a kid who stole in your teenage years, maybe you will get something important taken from you later I life. I also think that family karma is all linked but I’ll just leave that all out.
So for example, when I was younger I was always “a wonderer” of sorts. Whenever I got bored walking around a store with my mother, I would walk away and “explore!” as I liked to call it. Needless to say, I got lost a lot, but I had fun. Today, if I’m upset or just need to think, I automatically take a walk. I walk for hours sometimes. I think I may be wrong about personality…I hope not…but anyway I think that makes me still a curious person, someone out to see new things.
In my elementary and junior high years, I was fairly social. Actually I was social period. Now you look at me and I am so quiet- for the most part. I long to be talkative like the people I see but I can’t. I don’t think people would listen if I spoke too much. See, still that social spirit.
Last, is the karma thing. When I was younger I think I was a mean person. I was too “strong”- for lack of a better word and just bad in general. It is my belief that I developed a potentially terminal illness for this reason. It was the world telling me that I was terrible and if I did not stop doing what I was doing there would be consequences. Now that I have lived far past that, I have a comfortable life- and I believe it is because I worked to earn it.
Tarah T.
What you believe is probably pretty close to what I said. I hope what I said only counts as one thing. Like you is one being who may not “change” but altar one’s lifestyle. I think what your blog says is a cuter way of saying all that too. Probably more concise as well. I’m okay with that though. Haha. Nice job.
In light of recent events, I’ve had an epiphany of sorts. Learning by making idiotic mistakes is the absolute wrong way to handle your life. Whether you realize it or not, what you’re living right now is your life. It’s not life on your own, or out in the real world, but it will evolve into that when you reach the right age. It’s kind of like a pokemon… haha. If I would have written this blog two days ago, I know it would’ve been so misguided and depressing, but now I can say that I’m starting new and you’ll be the first people to see the change begin.
There are things I’ve always seen as guiding principles but I’ve never wholeheartedly followed them. It’s kind of like, only doing the right thing when it’s good for you. If you find a 50$ bill on the ground in Wawa, the RIGHT thing to do is to ask anyone if they’d lost the money, but seeing as you need a new pair of shoes, you swipe the cash and peace. It’s not right and I’ve always known right from wrong but everything comes to a breaking point. Everyone has a wakeup call and you have to choose to change or stay the same. So as my principles morph into better versions of themselves, I’ll choose something that I can say has worked out for me thus far.
I believe that if you are truly remorseful for something, you deserve a second chance, a way back, a guiding light or a helping hand. Obviously this does not extend to something done to be hateful or spiteful, but to those who have misgivings of character and poor judgment at one point or another. And there are 3 types of situations that this belief gives way to.
1.Being remorseful for something you have done to someone else.
Example #1: You are frustrated over a bad test score and while in the midst of scanning the questions you got wrong, your teacher notices you squirming in your seat and asks you if you are alright. In the heat of the moment you might have snapped back with an attitude and a bit of an insult. Obviously, if you’re not used to getting bad grades (like I am! ;p) the negativity isn’t your normal self and you will soon regret how your teacher sees you. Miss/Mister. Cop-an-attitude-with-me-for-no-good-reason! If and when you realize that the way you spoke to your mentor was wrong (and give an acceptable apology) you should be rewarded with your good name back.
2.Another individual being remorseful for something they’ve done to you.
Example#2: You just broke up with your guy of 6 months. He cheated on you with some slut from Mainland that you’ve never heard of. You steal her number from his phone and flip on her for doing such a horrible thing to you and your life. Her explanation doesn’t matter at the time but the next day when she leaves you a message on facebook, your eyes open up. He lied to her and told her that he was single and she trusted his sweet talk. She had no idea that you existed and she apologizes for making you upset and doesn’t want to hurt you anymore. This is when you should extend your heart out to the girl and tell her it’s okay and you forgive her.
3.Being remorseful for something you’ve done to yourself.
Example#3: Me almost losing my license for the rest of my life. I felt like a freakin’ idiot and due to my complete and utter regret, a good man helped me out and gave me a second chance. THAT’S WHAT I’M TALKIN’ BOUTTTT! See you all on the road March 25th <333
Any way the cookie crumbles, having someone or something to help you see the right path is a lifesaver. If you’ve done something wrong, understand it and embrace it, apologize to whomever deserves it and get some help and closure. I feel like a motivational speaker. Haha. Can anyone else tell how happy I am?!?!
49 DAYSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
The minute I thought of this blog, my attention was drawn to my worn-in, old blue notebook sitting in my room, on the table next to my bed. This book contains a variety of different things that I've collected over the years- self analyses (hmm. What is the plural of analysis?), responses to passages from books and segments from TV, my view on a current event, and, most importantly, quotes. I'm a quote fiend. I collect them, I horde them, and I search endlessly for them. I have pages and pages of quotes in this blue notebook of mine, gathered from various media over the years. When I see one I like, I run upstairs to my room, grab the notebook, and jot it down. I don't write down stupid, sappy quotes either. In the 13 pages of quotes I have written down, I don't think a single one is about love, or friendship, or how great the world is. Those kinds of quotes aren't interesting or inspiring to me, and I avoid them at all costs. Normally, I stick to the more realistic aspects of life, whether it be Lestat's compelling revalation in "The Vampire Lestat" ("But that's just it! We don't make any discovery at that moment! We merely.. stop! WE pass into nonexistence without ever knowing a thing. DO you realize that? We'll never know why the hell any of it happened, not even when it's over! We're going to die and not even know. We'll never know."), to Stephen King's description of the world in "The Shining" ("This inhuman place makes human monsters." <- This is actually one of my favorites, by the way.), to Rorschach's relentless questioning of human nature ("Is that what happens to us? A life of conflict with no time for friends, so that when its done, only our enemies leave roses?" and "The streets are extended gutters and the when the drains finally scab over, all the vermin will drown."). I even have quotes from random songs I hear on the radio or that I stumble upon in my iPod. I have quotes from Kansas's "Dust in the Wind" and "The Beginning is the End is the Beginning" by the Smashing Pumpkins. It doesn't matter how nonsensical or ridiculous the quote is. I have quotes from Cato the Elder ("After I'm dead I'd rather have people ask why I have no monument than why I have one."), from Fran Lebowitz ("There is no such thing as inner peace. There is only nervousness and death."), and from Gore Vidal ("A good deed never goes unpunished.")
Clearly, there's a trend here, and as I leaf through the pages and pages of quotes I've written down, it's becoming all too apparent in what I believe in and the notions that affect my everyday actions. I don't think that the world is a good place, and I don't think that the people that inhabit it are goood, either. I don't trust them, and I don't like being around them. I guess you could venture to say that these aren't really "beliefs", but, in my case, they are pretty much the only things I know I can believe in, and they most certainly affect my actions and my views on the world.
Personally, I think that man is a dying race. Consumed by our greed and driven by the prospect of self betterment, we've festered in our own filth for centuries. We've carelessly used our resources, gorging ourselves with oil, coal, and natural gas to fufill our bloated and pretentious lifestyles. We've hacked and burned through our forests, destroying both the homes of indiginous creatures and the integrity of our earth. We have become our own worst enemy, racing to create weapons whose disastrous effects would most certainly end our world, laughing pompously as we perch upon our pillars of capitalism and democracy, thinking that although we near the brink of utter annihilation, we still have time to reverse the effects of our poor foresight. Our children sit in uneffective school systems, more concerned with teaching conformity and political correctness than free and original thought. How can we say there is good left in this world when all we see left and right is deciet, maliciousness, and greed? Murder, rape, incest, bombs, war, greed, bankruptcy, corruption- these are the fundamentals of a human lifestyle. Everything else, everything good we see in life, is merely a pitiful attempt to cover up the harsh and bitter reality.
That may seem a bit general, but I know that these principles are found in everyone. I walk down the hallway every day and I see liars, cheaters, hypocrites, manipulators, and gossipers swarming like flies over the weak. I've never met a person I've trusted. I've never met anyone who I felt hasn't stabbed me in the back. Where am I supposed to turn? I trust myself, and only myself. And that's how it will always be.
There are so many beliefs of mine that stem from this main one, and although those may be fleeting and unimportant, this will never change. Needless to say, it has a profound impact on my relationships with other people and my outlook on life and what I want to do with it. Robert Byrne said that "The purpose of life is a life of purpose", and I've found my place and purpose in life. I'm the realist. I'm the "monster" and the "freak" and the "weirdo", the person who won't "see the bright side" of things. So be it.
"We had seen the light at the end of the tunnel, and it was out."
- John C. Clancy
Alice:
I wish I could see things the way you do. I can't find happiness anywhere, no matter how hard I try.
I'm reading through everyone's comments and I realized that I never really stated what my core principle was.
So, here it is:
No one can be trusted. Corruption is everywhere. There is no escape. There is no place to hide. I'm just trying to keep my head above water until I'm pulled back down.
Ashley. You are my hero.
I'm not kidding. Your blogs are amazing, and inspirational, and I will have that first little nugget fermenting in my brain for quite some time, I assure you. A fancy coat. God, I have no idea how you live your life, but it has granted you exhilirating insights that I wish I had. But since I don't, I will simply enjoy reading them in your weekly blog. <3
Okay, here is my "list" so to speak:
I believe that my pens will one day run out of ink.
I believe that my computer will eventually crash.
I believe that dragonflies have really big teeth but choose not to bite
and that band-aids really do take away the pain even if it's just for a
little while.
I believe in training wheels.
I believe that if no one has ever called you a freak you haven't lived
up to your potential (which I have met several times over.)
I believe that parents generally have loved each other at least once in
their lives.
I believe that no one is beyond redemption and everyone deserves a
second and even third chance.
I believe that no one is ever perfect, just full of themselves.
I believe in the power of picnics and that nighttime is the best time
to laugh like crazy.
I believe in hugging strangers.
I believe that phone calls are generally useless and that
tele-marketers are just doing their jobs.
I don't believe in politics but I believe in my right to choose freedom
or fate.
I believe that the best tasting foods are just a little burnt and that
calling something that is chard "blackened" changes the taste.
I believe paste tastes better than celery but I'll always chose celery
over paste.
I believe that there are some people out there who use drugs but
shouldn't and that there are some people out there who don't use drugs
but should.
I believe that those extra nine minutes after the snooze alarm make all
the difference in my day.
I believe that we are all basically faithful to everyone but ourselves.
I believe time is never free.
I believe sobbing is violently beautiful.
I believe in wood-knocking, eyelash wishes, birthday cake, and foot
rubs.
I believe that songs around a campfire make me whole and I believe in
the joy of a perfect marsh-mellow.
I believe in one way tickets, not one way streets.
I believe that people who are overly happy in the mornings for no
reason are the most frightening people on the planet.
I believe that no one is beyond forgiveness but there is simply not
enough time or forgiveness to go around.
I believe faith is never easy but that we are all faithful somehow.
I believe Transformers are the greatest models for morals.
I believe in Harvey Dent.
I believe that the greatest friends a person can have are always just a
little crazy.
I believe nothing is impossible, just highly improbable.
I believe that God created chocolate, candy canes, and spell check (I
can't spell for crap!)
I believe clowns will never be something that people do not fear.
I believe common things are the most beautiful and seeing grown men cry
in joy makes me giddy.
I believe that Satan has better things to do than watch me all day.
I believe people are stupid but love them just the same.
I believe if you don't imagine yourself as an animal at least once in
your life you will never grow to be anything worth while.
I believe in counting steps and lolly-gaging and you should loiter for
a few moments in front of signs telling you not to.
I believe there is no problem that can't be solved by a grilled cheese
sandwich.
I believe that the greatest gifts you can give are time, patience,
attention, and anything deep fried and smothered in chocolate.
I believe there is no problem you can't ignore, laugh at, make fun of,
back slap, drown in a carton of ice cream, or run over with a car.
I believe all babies aren't cute.
I believe that dancing in public for change is a great way to earn
money, sandwiches, laughs, and a place in the memories of complete
strangers.
I believe the greatest conversations take places in buses, trains, and
theaters with people you have only met moments before.
I believe that knowing is half the battle and the other half either
involves killing the enemy, pillaging and raping, or something in
between.
I believe that the teachers you will remember forever are those that
scared the living tar out of you at least once or twice and you will
always remember the ones that you hate.
I believe in shopping cart races, gluing quarters to the floor, and
running up the down escalators.
I believe jumping as the elevator moves is exhilarating.
I believe in making noise in restaurants, laughing out loud in public,
creating public scenes, moving chairs onto the middle of a frozen lake,
and having a great time doing everything and anything you want.
I believe in sneaking food into movie theaters and throwing popcorn at
the screen.
I believe that Kirmet the Frog would make the funniest pimp.
I believe in the strength of a father's hands building a dog house.
I believe that if you don't write things down you'll have no proof that
they ever happened.
I believe the greatest people in the world are those not afraid to
speak up for themselves in any situation.
I believe Jesus would pwn all noobs in video games (his Final Judgment
Attack is a force to be reckoned with.)
I believe that if we can dream it we can make it.
I believe that love punches are the best greetings and that I'm not
mean, just friendly that way.
I believe that no one is worth crying over and those who do won't make
you cry.
I believe in the power of wearing neon green to funerals and that you
should be having a good time despite the fact that you're in the room
with a dead guy.
I believe that a good friend will always be there to bail you out of
trouble and a great friend will be there next to you saying "DAMN! THAT
WAS FUN!"
I believe that graveyards are the best places to take a nap because no
one will try to stop you.
I believe that only real men and the overly flamboyant gays wear pink.
I believe that life needs sound effects. WOOT WOOT BOOSH!!
I believe that pants are over rated.
I believe that I have written enough about my beliefs.
Post separately:
I know, I know, I know. But I couldn't pick a key belief. I might as
well just say "Whelp, I'm Mormon, just go and look it up on wiki," but
I decided not to. I decided to take the time to write this stuff out
(and yes, I do believe in all of this stuff.)
Any way,
MattW: I liked your bit on having people start off on a clean slate. I
think that is really noble of you to try and stay away from
stereotyping people and the lot. Great JOB! XD and just so you know, I
think that there is a heck of a lot more to you than just your brains
and your kind hearted sense of self. You're a great person to hang
around and you are always willing to help bail me out of trouble.
THanks a billion +1! And ignore your momma, she doesn't know beans! I
like that fact that you want to be someone other than the classed
"smart kid," it's good that you want to break out of the mold many pace
around you. I broke the mold *SMASH SMASH SMASH* with a little help
from my good friend HAMMER!! *BREAK BREAK BREAK SMASH SMASH
CRASH!!!*.....oops.... :P I believe in Matty Warner!
Alice: you are ADORABLE!!!! Never change! that was a great post and I
like the idea of happiness coming from perspectives. WOOT WOOT!!XD
YAYS!! ME ES DONE!!!
Molly:
Haha you deffinetly live by karma since that is your answer when anything bad happens to someone. Also I really liked what your coach told you that "When you wake up tomorrow you will still be Molly Gondolf." This applys to everyone because things that happen outside your inner self will not phase who you ultimatly are.
Morgan:
I remember when you wanted to be a librarian! Also, Kerri and her mother were straight up ridiculous so who cares what they thought. Also I think that the motto you live by of being what you want to be will bring you happiness and love in life besides doing something you don't feel passionatly about and having sucess like many people do today.
Devon:
I love you girl cause you seriously make me second guess my inappropriate and bitchy behavior. When I first met you as a freshman I was like, "Wow, this is the nicest person I've ever met in my life." You haven't changed. Although I've heard you make hilarious side comments about different things you genuinely care for others and their feelings and I respect that so much. <3
Myra, out of your long list, I caught the Transformers reference. I believe we already had a talk about this.
To really represent my beliefs, I’ll list off two values that I keep close to me; the power of the question, and walking in someone else’s shoes.
First off, I’ve had a hard time accepting things “just because,” ever since I was small. I was watching a home video of myself from back when I was 3. I’ve noticed one thing. Well, asides from the fact that I had no pants on (apparently my parents did not believe in clothing their children when video taping them) was me constantly saying “Nande? Nande?”
Nande is Japanese for why. It was probably one of the first words I’ve ever learned, and probably the most used word in my vocabulary, maybe not in conversation but definitely in my head. I question everyone’s motives and desires. I try to question most of the information I get, and make sure to validate it. I have a habit of researching and confirming facts if I feel the slightest tinge of a mistake.
As far as caring goes, I tend to think of myself as empathetic. Not the bullshit word people toss around as a feel-good word, but the genuine kind. When I mean I care for people and things, I mean it. I’m the guy who drives 50 miles to pickup his friend when his car breaks down, or dropping off his idiot best friend’s keys after he left them in the weight room (ahem). I usually end up donating most of my money to charity (and Jordan, who owes me quite a bit). I’m not saying I’m overly emotional, because I’m not very neurotic at all. I just really feel the need to see both side of the story, and to help out whoever needs it.
There’s so many things I want to be when I get older. As my friend Rachael put it, I’ll end up being a doctor-history teacher-journalist-psychologist-rock star astronaut. However, the one aspiration I have permanently etched into my career path is to join the Peace Corps at one point in my life. And do some charitable work.
However, from my past experiences, people generally tend to forget about those two traits I just listed. I truly think that human nature has slowly been corroding over time, and it’s soon going to be reduced to a bare-bones skeleton.
Everyone seems to be so enamored with distancing themselves from their neighbors, and building their own pretentious little world. Love is slowly turning from something you feel unto others into something you feel for yourself. Identity and creativity are both being slowly sanded away until all that’s left are dusty wood shavings and uniform blocks. Quite frankly, it disgusts me and scares me.
*(Note that this isn’t a rant on conformity. I’m not a non-conformist. I find the whole conformity argument to be rather dense and pointless. I don’t think I fit into either side; I’m just chilling as an outlier on the line. I just feel the overwhelming need to maintain my identity and my values.)
So anywho, my biggest and driving belief is to protect all the values I have, which would be the ones I listed above, with the addition of numerous other ones. I really don’t think my values fit in very well into society, so I might as well protect it, for people are going to try to change the person I am. I don’t want that. As several people brought up a couple of blogs ago, without your values, you are a shell.
Some people take happiness in throwing away their core beliefs for convenience or acceptance. That, personally, is when I lose all respect I have for a person. Although I’m guilty of it sometimes, hypocrisy is the one thing that shatters my respect towards a fellow human being. Not a small violation, but when one goes against everything they believe in. It’s sickening. To put it simply; if your values are fake, then I guess that makes you fake as well. A tool, if you will.
"Keep a level head and do not do anything that goes against your moral compass. Cherish your values, hone them, and apply them."
Sounds like I’m being a hard ass conservative here… which is kind of funny since I’m on the top left edge of the political diamond (libertarian).
Maybe the amazing Geddy Lee put it best;
“Though his mind is not for rent,
Dont put him down as arrogant.
His reserve, a quiet defense,
Riding out the days events.”
'Scuse me while I go listen to some more Parliament Funkadelic.
Maeg Reese - We have to go on another car ride. And we're bringing Sexatron along.
I’ve had the opportunity to realize that it’s not ignorance that is bliss, but rather the idea of simply not caring that makes someone bliss. Fundamentally all people know the difference between right and wrong, good and bad, black and white, so how can we excuse someone for not knowing these commonsense situations? What the real problem is, is that they simply do not care. Some of the people we’re closest to simply do not care that they’re handling a situation completely wrong, and are therefore hurting people.
So how do you make someone care? Not the type of care, where we would pick a topic and argue it, but actually take the person we care about and drill it into their head that their hurting us. In something so obvious that we expect people to recognize with and see, we are sometimes left in the cause alone and let down at the fact that the person doesn’t see things the same as we do.
I’m now contemplating on whether human beings can harmonize with each other. We all feel the emotions of joy, loss, hope, love, grief, etc, but do we honestly understand one another? We all understand these emotions, and in a pathos way of thinking can easily relate to each other through these emotions that we feel, but were still left wondering whether we really ‘feel’ each other. From day to day we interact with one another showing the way we think and feel. We show someone what we think is funny, what we think is stupid, what we think is gay, or what we think is amazing. We show each other things hoping and expecting them to relate or agree. What I’ve come to realize over the past couple of days is that whether people see eye to eye with me or they completely disagree with me, through our emotions and actions we can all influence each other.
Alyssa influenced me seven years ago when I first met her. Hanging out with Alyssa changed my entire outlook on things. I was carefree and always happy. Over the years I’ve come to realize that best friends, or even one single best friend are so rare to come across, and that for a lot of people they might not ever get to have one. Having a best friend influenced not only who I was then, but also who I’ve become. Seeing that in some cases influence can take place so easily, I now ask if the same stands for me being able to influence other people. I’ve acknowledged over the past couple of years that Alyssa has changed, and now I sit here wondering if I can change her back. What I’m learning is that where some changes in people occur so easily, the same change that we desire in others doesn’t occur at all.
Through this blog writing about the ability to influence people, I’m beginning to realize that I know the least about influence. The two most influential parts of my life would have to be my faith and Alyssa, and I can’t think of any words to describe this influence. All that can be said is that experiencing this influence and watching it pervade my thoughts only assures me that it is a significant part of someone’s life that is there so it can be shared. In that idea, I believe in the power of people to affect, change, and ultimately influence other human beings.
‘How am I supposed to be me when there are very few "real" people left surrounding me? How can I still trust that we are all good deep down when there are people hurting me left and right? Girls I thought were my friends seem to ostracize me now.’
- Devon P
Devon I completely get where you’re coming from. Although the situations might be different, I’m beginning to see the different paths that people, specifically my friends, are taking and that expectations that I set for these people are now being lowered, all to my disappointment. Although I’m seeing a lot of changes in their lives, a huge part of me knows deep down that their still the same people they were, and this is why I can’t help but have love for them.
Every blog question is extremely strenuous on my mind which is often why I put them off until the last minute. Although I think about these things everyday, when I am actually asked these questions, I stumble. I’ve been reading other’s responses and trying to think what mottos I live by and I think I’ve come up with a few.
First I believe that success comes to those who work the hardest and are the most passionate about what they do. This mainly applies to sports at this time in my life. When I was younger, there were friends of mine who used to be the best soccer, basketball, and softball players that I always wished some day I could amount to. When I reached high school two things happened to these people; they got lazy, and boys came into the picture. These very talented individuals wasted their skills and expected success by taking the easy way out of everything. We see it everyday, smart people not trying in school or doing work, an intelligent worker not motivated enough to be at the top, and gifted athletes who never practice and are satisfied at their average level. This is why although I don’t do so as much in academics, in athletics, I work my butt off because I want to be the best I can be.
Another thing I live by is that life is basically a guessing game. Often it is unfair, taking the lives of small children and best friends, sometimes what I believe that the harder workers will come out on top lose it all, good people get lost in drugs and violence, and many people can’t survive without destroying their morals and stealing from others. Why the world offers so many devastating casualties is unknown to everyone. I don’t think I can believe in fate or destiny because I can’t stomach that somehow it was fate for someone to die to save another. Really all I know for sure is that the world is cruel and toiling place to live and often it takes the life of people before they can even generate a thought or belief. This is why living life to the fullest is truly necessary, so regrets never encumber the remainder of your existence.
Finally the last thought I have is that without a strong friend base a support from others, an individual will fail to find themselves in life. I believe that the people you meet shape who you become in life because you learn from them just as they learn from you. True friendship is hard to find, but when it is, it should be cherished and held onto because it can last a lifetime. You can’t survive in this dog eat dog world without someone there to pick you up and motivate you to achieve all that you’ve dreamed of.
I’m not sure if this is exactly what was required but I hope it’s close.
A fundamental belief, a mantra, a code of honor. Though it is impossible for a single one to guide every aspect of your life, there is no doubt that some prevailing idea that we follow. It goes beyond the generalities that society has been built upon. We follow it to the very end, and in some cases, literally to death.
What belief do I follow throughout my life? If I said something simple, I’d likely be mentally slapped across the face, so I’ll make sure to explain all the details. Somewhat ironically, it is probably harder to simplify it anyways.
The basic idea behind my beliefs is “Help others, as long as long as the effort doesn’t completely trump their need…or if they’re just being lazy.” No, I will not rescue your kitty conveniently perched above a raging river that poofed into existence for plot-related purposes. I will not grab that book for you if you’re within hand’s reach. Actually, I’d probably lob it at your head if I know you well enough. I will however, help out with work that you truly don’t understand. I will do some object-picking-upping when everything is scattered about. I will also save the world of all problems through doing strange dancing to various popular songs, though that’s likely not happening. By the way, anyone who gets the reference, and are not named Dan or Brendan deserves an imaginary cookie.
After writing it out, the concept actually seems quite simple. It is the things that I deem needed that seem to make it complicated, and that, is a bit too much to write out completely. I’m not one to actually care about most stories that come my way, nor do I ignore them completely. Whether I should “help” someone or not is one of my most effective senses. If I do, I’ll feel sympathy or empathy. If I don’t, I feel nothing. And if they try to abuse my kindness, and are horrible or not good enough at hiding it, I can tell as I have a strange urge to toss them through a window. I haven’t actually tried it though…yet.
Perhaps I should now say how I ended up this way. However, one word would explain it. Videogames. Though, like many, whether or not they actually follow it, the idea of being kind, and “The Golden Rule” had been ingrained into my mind since my childhood. The idea of being a hero, and saving others with special powers became ingrained in my mind for years. And then I grew up… and played some less cliché games. The idea of being a selfless hero began to fly away. Frankly, it is silly to try to keep others from danger by using yourself like a human shield. Heck, it’s actually a bit hypocritical. I then moved on with my life, went into a overly emotional phase, went back to the heroic idea, and then finally put it as a dream to aim for, instead of treating it like reality.
If I wish hard enough, it may come true; a chance to toss someone out a window, that is. The other thing, I have to work for.
"I believe sobbing is violently beautiful."
Myra, I loved your blog. It was amazing to read, and I agree with this statement 100%.
I remember, as a child, always dreaming of growing up to become a police officer. I was positive that was my destiny in life, and, as a seven-year old boy, nothing was going to alter my mindset. To me, a cop was a symbol of courage, of bravery, an action figure who blew away the bad guys and rescued the helpless victims. They were strong, they were admired, and they were heroes. My quixotic ideal of a life-saving officer was bred from their countless appearances in my favorite television shows and movies as invincible guardians of peace, justice, and the American way. Sadly, as I grew older, I began to realize this fantasy that i had conjured in my mind was nowhere to be found in the real world. Unfortunately, my picture of a police officer soon morphed into the form of a chunky, balding, middle-aged man who was more than content to sit on a street corner all day sipping coffee, moving from his comfortable position only to deal with the annoyance of handing out tickets to the immoral citizens who dared to put a little too much pressure on the gas pedal.
Needless to say, I have since abandoned my childhood dream of speeding around in a patrol car as I have reached the realization that I can put my various talents to much better use in a different profession. Nevertheless, I still cling to the principles of selflessness and courage I acquired from such characters. This is simply a sampling of one of the many seemingly trivial occurences that have been crucial in molding me as a person and establishing the virtues that help guide my life. Yet the most important lessons I have learned have not been taught via entertainment and fantasy; rather, the examples of my parents and, by extension, their parents, have taught me invaluable lessons that can only be passed down from parent to child. My parents taught me how I should act and react in different situations, without directly telling me what is right and what is wrong, what I should and what I shouldn't do. They knew I would discover the answers to those questions on my own, but their examples gave me a strong foundation upon which to base my everyday decisions. The most important thing I have attained from observing my parents is how to help other people, regardless of who it is. Watching my dad stop on the side of the road to help out a stranger, or visiting the hospital to be a warm smile and friendly face to a patient who may have only needed to know that someone cared, those are the type of things that stick with me. Seeing my mom spending each and every day chauffeuring her six children to and from practices and games, cooking meals morning, noon, and night, and always putting our needs and wants in front of her own has taught me the imprtance of being humble and grateful. To put it simply, all these lessons I have learned from parents, coaches, teachers, and even TV shows, can be summarized with one short phrase: Live for others.
By reviewing this blog and today’s in class discussion I realized that the values we hold in our minds and the truths that we speak of are not necessarily the ones we live out every day. I bring this to attention as it alters the nature of the question we are posed with. For I see in myself an aspect of my personality which many of my piers mirror. We go about flaunting our morals and values throughout our essays and speeches but we constantly live our lives in direct contrast to the values we hold in such high esteem. From my own words I have preached to the class about rolling with the blows and living life above the rules. My own words therefore testify against me as I speak them while sitting in a government approved desk, within a standard concrete room, filed away amongst a thousand others in a government mandated educational complex.
But still I sit. I sit and have words flow freely from my mouth spouting ideas of independence and opportunity. Advocating freedom with each adjective and venturous notions with each verb. So how can I repeatedly sit here day after day, a slave to an unknown entity, following a path with and end that I can’t discern? This question had me, still has me in a quagmire. After a deep inflection (30 to 40 seconds) I thought that the reason the booming voice of independence within me does not change my path is because of the effort of the millions of whispers of friends, society, influence and rationality building up against it. Simply because an idea was the first to jump into your head does not mean it is the only one present. From all of this I’ve deducted that for those of us with strong forceful opinions we have yet to learn to realize the entirety of ourselves and that even within what feels to be the strong skies of certainty winds of change can exist.
As we pilot ourselves through the skies we must be wary of these winds. The slightest buffet or change in pressure could send us careening to our deaths before we realize what had happened. This was the challenge faced by so many social pioneers in our history. Ben Franklin on his search for temperance and modesty, and Thoreau trying to find a balance with himself in nature. The objective is to be able to see all sides of an issue and plot a course through it. Again I was faced with this dilemma when we discussed love. Before I diverge onto a topic discussing sex and lust I mean to say that I could not find the distinction between living a life of temperance and how that is affected by feelings of passion. If you live a tempered life do you feel passion? Is it bad to feel it? Or should you just pursue passion and forgo temperance? These questions plagued me and still do. I don’t pretend to be self aware enough to know to what means I should pursue the values in my life. Oh, that’s what this blog is about…well then…
“Do not live your life for others, live it for yourself” how are we judged in life? Rather, how are we not judged would give us a shorter answer. We as a people are built to scrutinize others, look for weaknesses to exploit and capitalize on the downfall of others. We all do it, especially in this class. I don’t mean to criticize anyone for it as it is the nature of a hunter. The weakest ones are the easiest to take down. Injured? Dejected? Hurt? Sounds like an easy dinner. In a society such as this every action we take is looked upon and weighed and finally compared against the value of others. I personally feel this is the greatest flaw of humans and you should live your life free of that burden. So the basis of this is to make the decision that you feel are right and to avoid the collective eye of society burning your back as you turn away refusing to give in to its stare. It’s a hard thing to do, and I can safely say there isn’t a single person in our class who does that. Even if unattainable it’s a goal that can always be aimed for.
In response to molly:
I love coaches. They always seem to be the people who can make you completely sure of yourself and always have advice that will pick you up after you’ve bombed a race. Except in Mr. A’s case…I can always expect a depressing remark from him. But it still brightens my day in a comically depressing sense. But anyway that fact that you will always be yourself is a reassuring thought. When people get too caught up in what everyone else thinks they start to lose who they are and before they know it they’ve become someone else. That’s what I wanted to stress in my blog, the ability to avoid being what everyone else expects you to be. The problem with both of our blogs though is that we are always changing. Yes you will still wake up and be molly gondolf or matt capone but who that person is changes day to day. The trick is that we have to try and moderate who we are becoming and make sure we are always aware and ok with the changes.
Guiding principle... Guiding Principle... Guiding Rule... Golden Rule... Right! The golden rule! Now I know we've heard the golden rule is do unto others as you would have them blah blah blah... But, that's silly. Good advice, but it runs counter to human nature. And so, I have, due to personal experience and firm scientific experimentation, come up with one unifying law, one item that will never steer you wrong.
People are stupid, and there's nothing you can do.
Simple, sweet and to the point. Saved me a lot of heartache right there. I was going to go with something fate-related, but I figure there are exceptions to that. That, something I stole from my dad, has no exceptions. We are a stupid species. I, frankly, am amazed we survived up till now. I hate stupid people. As I recall, Jordan shares this anger, and his stupid people island is sounding pretty good right now.
Running a red light when a school bus is turning. Texting at the wheel. Playing World of Warcraft while your parents think you're doing your blog at 7 o'clock on a Wednesday night. We all do them. I may be projecting the third one, but that's beside the point. (Or is it? Yeah it is.)
But back to the point, we all do these things. We know it's not a smart thing to do, but we do it anyway. There are a myriad of reasons, but it all comes down to one thing that overrides all other excuses. Stupidity. All other reasons are covering up the fact. We've made fun of others for doing it, and know our hypocrisy even as we start the act. We're smart kids, which makes us particularly adept at inventing better-than-usual excuses.
The last paragraph in a sentence: We do more dumb things, but are better at covering our asses.
Wait, what? Did I who says all people are stupid just call us AP kids smart? Yes I did. It's cool, I took the hypocritic oath. But seriously, it's all perspective. When I say we're smart, it means we're smarter than the average bear, which is slightly smarter than the average person. We're generally smarter than the populace, but we're still fairly stupid.
And as to the 'nothing you can do about it part,' I've beat myself up and run myself ragged trying to stop people from doing something stupid, and I've come to that conclusion partly from laziness, and partly from the desire to stop wasting time. People will always be stupid. That's one of three constants in life, the others being time continuing and Antman being lame. And with the magnitude of people being stupid surrounding us every day, trying to stop it would be like trying to stop everyone in the entire world from dying indefinitely. Exemplary. But pointless.
There are a few others that I believe in, but none quite so catchy or consistently applicable.
And with that note, I bid you all Adieu. England Prevails. (Bonus Points for those who catch the reference)
Know who you are and in the despair of a single moment when your true colors show be proud of your character. – Megli
I am not going to tell you what life is about because hell I don’t even know yet. Everyone has a story and to know that some of the people currently in my life are apart of my story is an honor. I am surrounded every day with magnificent human beings who show me that being you is one of the most important things in life. The hard part about sticking to my own motto that I strive to live by is the fact that I do not commit to the most crucial part. I have no idea who I am! I guess I just know that I am not the person that people make me out to be. I know what some people think of me, good or bad, but that is their opinion. I often find myself pondering upon the endless possibilities when I embark on the next exciting chapter of my life which is college. When I go to college with new people who have no idea who I am then I will have the freedom of being myself. When I escape this town and move on to greater things my journey has just begun. Maybe being myself comes when I find a way to stop caring about what others think of me. I just want being me to be enough. I won’t have people questioning if I’m fake because I have changed, yet they will be more interested in wanting to know the real Meagan Lee. As I see people around me grow and change into themselves it makes me wonder when I will have the courage to do the same. One of my main goals in life is to be proud of the person that I am regardless of the situation. The words pride and confidence can be intertwined. In order to have pride in your character you need confidence. At this point I lack confidence in every possible last thing about myself. The blog states “explore some of your own core beliefs and choose one guiding principle that you would like to shape your journey into adulthood and throughout life.” The fact that I do not know who I am is irrelevant to the task because we were supposed to create or choose and aphorism that we would like to shape our journey into adulthood. I hope that years from now I will be able to remember what I wrote as my motto. Wherever life’s journey takes me as long as I know who I am and am proud of it I shall have no regrets.
Molly-
“I was going to say that I live my life through the meaning of fate, “everything happens for a reason.” But then I thought that was too cliché. And at times I don’t believe I live my life that way. Often I question why god has put me into a position, often feeling bad for myself. So fate was out of the question, I don’t honestly live my life that way, it is probably something I did wish I lived by.”
Before I began writing I decided to read a blog or two and I came across yours. This section was something that I was going to write about at first as well but then I too realized that it was too cliché. Often I find myself questioning fate and everything happening for a reason, but that will not completely make me loose the belief in it. I am not sure if you watch Grey’s Anatomy but for any of you Grey’s lovers one of the most recent episodes helps me believe in fate. There was a murder that was dieing and he was a certain amount of days away from the death penalty. Every time that he told Meredith a story she would question him by saying are you telling the truth (or something along those lines) and his response was, “Whatever helps you sleep at night.” The murder ends up being a match for a child in the same hospital who was dieing and needed a new liver ASAP. Meredith gave the patient a way to kill himself so that the child would be saved. Meanwhile the Murder desperately wanted to save the child which was a previous conversation that he and Meredith had. The patient asked Meredith if what she was doing was for him or for the kid? Meredith tells him to believe whatever will help him sleep at night. That was just a little recap but the point is that I believe in fate and everything happening for a reason because it is what helps me sleep at night.
Alright, disclaimer: I hate this blog. I didn’t mind reading the blog or coming up with my answer to the blog, nor writing an answer to said blog. But I hate reading my answer. I know it sounds cliché, disgustingly cliché, but I hate to say that I do actually think like this. It sickens me, the abhorrence I feel for this response, but I need to hand it in, so here.
It's unfortunate that I have such a quick answer for this blog, I feel as if I’ve missed some sort of relevant revelation. But alas, it was unpreventable. My eyes scanned the words "Have you ever thought about what the guiding principles in your life are? By guiding principles I simply mean the things in life that you truly and fundamentally believe; the beliefs that shape your decisions when you find yourself in a position where you have to make one," and I immediately knew what you meant. Now, this may be one of those aphoristic clichés that you were warning us against, but it holds true for me constantly, and every time I'm confronted with a decision I at least try to consider this aspect of it.
I believe every person deserves, fundamentally, two things in life: to be loved as a child and to have the chance to fulfill their dreams.
I would like to tell you that I took a trip into Boston as a child and saw inner city children in bad situations and it changed my perspective forever- but this simply isn't true. I grew up around kids. I cannot remember a time sans siblings, and I have been babysitting since I turned 7. Due to this excessive proximity, I have developed a crippling sense of empathy for people, particularly for children. I cannot handle crying children. I must- MUST, mind you- make them feel better immediately. Unless it’s the whiney kind of crying, which doesn’t bother me so much, but if it’s got anything to do with children feeling terror or extreme distress, I can’t deal with it.
And when I say crippling empathy, I mean CRIPPLING. I’ve only ever seen two minutes of the Titanic, and in those two minutes, a screaming toddler was shown in a hallway. The eyes you were seeing him through turned slightly and then glanced back- the boy was gone, and a large wave was where he used to be. I walked out of my living room in milliseconds and had nightmares for weeks. That may seem silly, but keep in mind that I’ve always had toddlers around. A slightly different example, Saving Private Ryan- I was crying in terror within minutes. Not because of the special effects or the pounds of fake blood they polluted that set with, but because of the countless times mankind has done this to themselves- forced the few to sacrifice for the many. And when they brought the news to Mrs. Ryan, I- having just stopped, mind you- I started tearing up all over again, because my mind literally cannot help but think, ‘Oh how awful she must feel’ at which point I promptly feel as awful as I think she must. I don’t know how many of you have ever felt like a mother, but as someone who’s called Nana by a third of the people in her house, allow me to attest that I cannot imagine a worse feeling.
And it is from this emphatic overload that I decided no one should ever go unloved. It takes so little to make a person’s day and so little to make someone feel loved- I can only believe that it is this fact that counterbalances the pain we cause each day. So in every decision I make I try a little bit more each day to make everyone I come into contact with feel good and loved, by me if no one else.
Well, I'd be a liar if I woke up everyday and said to myself, "Hilary! Be yourself! Remain true to who you are. An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind. Don't judge a book by its cover. Failure to prepare is preparation for failure!" Etc., etc., and etc. That would be ridiculous. Who wakes up and chants personal cliches to themselves? I wake up and am nearly comatose until 7:45, about halfway through drama class.
I didn't invent a cliche, per say, but I do have an attitude that I try to portray everyday. I must admit, I shaped my views that I hold today in Honors English II during the Transcendentalism movement studies. Up to Sophomore year, I let grades and pressures of school greatly impact my life. I've always been smart, and I've always worked my butt off at getting good grades. Good numbers. Sometimes, I let that drive come before my happiness. Also, in the younger years (ha ha last year), I was so connected to people, but in a bad way. I was dependent and trusted people with my heart, and then when I was disappointed, I was crushed. I kept the happy veneer, and I bottled up all of the things that upset me. This was a dumb thing to do, because it eats you up on the inside.
Then, back to Transcendentalism. Mr. Costal opened the literary door of Thoreau and Emerson, which, I believe, changed my outlook on a lot of things. My favorite saying from Emerson is "Simplify, simplify." That's it. Simplify. Don't let menial things that don't apply to you, like other people's woes and worries, tear you apart. Life is about self reflection and meditation, about beliefs and choices. His writings and teachings make you stop and think who you REALLY are, stripping away all of the excess fakeness. I changed last year, in a way that made me focus on the important things that were going on in my life. And that didn't include pleasing everyone or trying to live up to the impossible standards of what colleges want, or what my parents want, or what should be expected of an "honors student." This might sound selfish to be all about MY happiness and MY life, but for so long, I've been worried about worried about EVERYONE, and sort of forgot to take care of myself. However, a life without happiness isn't truly a life at all. I don't understand how anyone could live any other way. And happiness can be found in any situation-- no matter how hopeless or how terrifying. Then again, I've never really been tested in extreme cases. But that's just by the grace of God.
So... what does this all mean again? Ha ha. Well, my main principle in life is to "simplify" things enough to make life nothing short of phenomenal. I try not to get caught up in the mindless bull crap of high school and find to discover the person who I really am.
"I believe in Karma- what you give is what you get returned.
I believe you can't appreciate real love until you've been burned.
I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side.
I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye."
-Savage Garden :)
I love this song.
Myra, I wish I could be in your shoes, or at least in your mindset, for a day. I admit, I did not read your full blog, but you got my attention when you said, "I believe the greatest conversations take places in buses, trains, and
theaters with people you have only met moments before." I could not agree with you more, actually you're brilliant, and that's exactly right!
Janiru - I completely agree with what you say about hypocrisy. Not only does it destroy your respect for an individual, it can often lead you to become distrustful of people in general. I like your line "cherish your values, hone them, and apply them". These values make you who you are, and should not be adapted to appease a certain person or group.
Mae-
I read your blog, hanging on every word. You have an amazing way of presenting your thoughts and ideas.
Unfortunately, you're right. Corruption is everywhere and everything. But that is the nature of the beast. No one, no thing, is perfect. It is impossible. It is depressing. It is disgusting. It is inevitable.
However, I still think there is a little good in the world yet. It's just buried and overtaken by all of the evil. It's hard to find anymore.
Oh! And I have a quotes notebook too ha ha. :) I love it.
And Jani? I would love to go on a philosophical car ride with you and Maegan. It is long overdue. :)
The future is the only thing I can think of that can be described as scary and full of hope. (Except for Barack Obama in a monster costume) I have no clue what’s going to happen to me friends, family, and me as I journey into adulthood. There are so many roads to go down right now that even a Garmin can’t help me. And it’s this daunting fact that made me realize that the only thing I can depend on in life is myself. Luckily, I like myself. I like being a bit of a nerd, and acting goofy sometimes, and knowing most girl songs, and being good at video games, and I even like my broken knee a little. It makes me unique. If there was an exact clone of me, I bet we would be best friends. It’s this force in my life, my character and personality, that I want to guide me through the tough decisions I’m bound to face. I’m happiest when I act like my real self. It’s when I try to change that I find myself in a rut. If I try change to try to impress a girl, or act differently to be accepted into a group you’ll find I’m the most miserable. I do it because I think the grass will be greener on the other side. I think, if I can change, things will get better. So I venture through a barbed wire fence of discomfort and awkward social situations to see that other side, only to discover that I’m a much better landscaper than most.
It’s my personality that needs to be the compass that points me in the right direction. I just have to stop shaking it around so much and let magnetism do it’s work. When it comes down to it, I need to be true to myself. If I’m true to myself, I know I’ll make the right decisions, decisions that will make me happy and take me down the right path.
How do I know that if I just listen to myself that I’ll make the right decisions? Really, I don’t know. I’m far from perfect, and I’m going to make mistakes. But I rather have these mistakes be made by a clear headed version of me than some weird alter ego version. I want honesty to guide me through my life and all it’s problems. I don’t really believe in Karma, but I think if I’m just honest with myself and my peers I’ll make it through life just fine.
To Matt C
Well I honestly think that your blog was the best I've ever read. I thought I was reading something written by a professor of psychology because you delved so deeply into the human condition. I also noticed we share the same idea. Live life for yourself, and forget about all the bullcrap that other people think. It's a great philosophy to live by and I think it's the key to success.
Sorry if any of this doesn't make sense. The flu is making me confused and disoriented; well, I'm normally like that, but that's besides the point...anyway....
I'm not going to lie: after I saw this blog my head hurt even more, and I went to my bed and laid down again. Maybe it was just the whole being sick thing and that was effecting how my head felt, but what ever it was after I read this, my thoughts were clueless. I didn't know what to write about because I felt like their were way to many “moral codes” I lived by. I just waited to do the blog until today. At least I wouldn't feel that much sicker. Then I realized today while laying down, ”Hey, you live by like a few things, this isn't that hard.” So when I finally got the energy to, I got up and began writing about, well, I guess, me.
I'd like to start the first one with a corny, little quote by Dr. Norman Peale (an author and a preacher). Peale once stated in his book The Power of Positive Thinking that “If you want to get somewhere you have to know where you want to go and how to get there. Then never, never, never give up.”
My first moral code, which just realized in a sudden burst of reflection, is in the the very title of Peale's book. No matter what happens, you should try to stay positive. I bitch and moan about things, no doubt about it. In fact, I bitch about things a lot. So does everyone else. However, you have to learn to stay positive about things and see the good in them, especially if you can not change said things. For example, I was pissed that Obama had won our election over McCain(why?!!). That changed when I realized nothing could really be done at this point, so I pulled to positive out of that. I pulled so much out of him winning the election that I convinced myself that Obama was the better one when it came down to it. Now I stand by my president completely in hope that he will do the best he can. I definitely get this from my mom; I would know this because a hard head of a Republican as she is, she manages to like Obama since he got elected for all the stuff that America can get out of it. Their is no real reason to be negative about anything for long.(Of course, unless your a psychopathic maniac, this would exclude some things like genocide and anything along that nature.)
Now, back to the quote of the book. Peale's basis for this comment would be determination. Determination would definitely be something I harassed from my Dad since I was a taxi football player. It has almost been bread into me in a Spartan-like manner(I wasn't kicked in a whole or anything, but it was constantly pressed on me). He always taught me you should keep going and never quit at what your doing. Once you become apart of something, you should always do everything to your fullest. Whether it be sports, classes, or an actual place(you take a guess of what place I'm thinking....) the mental state should be never give up on that. Which also falls into a matter of commitment; once you become apart of something, quiting on it should not be an option. That's why I personally am hesitant about playing Lacrosse. Once I start playing, I'm morally NOT ALLOWED to give up; I have to stay with it(at least until the end of the season). Now this commitment part may seem like a bad thing to press yourself to live by, but it comes back to pulling out the positives. You learn to adjust to anything.
My final basic code that I can think of would also be in another quote, as well. “All day you can hide in the shadows and shout-out blasphemies, but make sure sun begins to set you show the world what you really are.” Isn't that corny? Yea it is! Because I made it. My personal moral description best summed up. All day, I tend to act crazy or heckle people just because, well I feel like deceiving them or they deserved it. In the end, when it really matters., I'll show who I really am:surprisingly humble and actually pretty concerned about other people feeling good. Irony? No, stupidity. Whatev.
That's my base! I'm going to go lay down now.
First things first, personally there isn't a more hated aphorism than the stupid "do to others as you wish others to do to you." One, it's impossible. People can't be nice all the time; it goes against human nature. Furthermore, it gets you literally no where in life. People will see that you will just continue to treat them nicely regardless of their actions, because hey you want them to treat you nicely right? I'll admit I'm guilty of stepping on those who will go to the ends of the Earth to be nice to me. Why? I'm human that's why, and I'm innately going to do what's best for me. In my opinion this aphorism should be changed to "treat others the way they SHOULD be treated." This obviously raises questions of who is going to judge how a person should be treated, and as usual I'm one step ahead of them. You're going to judge. Judge it based on their actions, their speech, and their drive to do something in life. For instance, if a person acts like an idiot, talks like an idiot, and doesn't do anything to help themselves out of there unfortunate idiot status, then it only makes sense you treat them like an idiot. Before I get called a racist or whatever else someone is thinking about calling me, I'm suggesting you get to know them before you judge them.
Now that's out of the way, time to get down to business.
After spending the last two days contemplating this question, the answer has finally graced the inside of my brain creases. I sat and questioned everything about my life; perusing through the multitudes of decisions and actions I have made within the last couple of years. As narcissistic as this may sound, the guiding principle that my life revolves around is the notion that "I am better than you." This doesn't culminate from some cocky inner love of myself, or rash display of confidence. It's just a way of life. Look around you, every single thing in life is a competition. Sports, a competition to win. The housing market,a competition to buy a certain house while others are all vying for there bid to be the highest. Mating, a competition to become the most eye-catching, enticing individual amongst the many others of your gender. In the grand scheme of things, life itself is a competition. Continually, it is understood that the first rule of competition is that person cannot doubt themselves, or else they will indubitably end up the loser. So, logically the only way to succeed in life is to believe that you are the better person in every situation.
Furthermore, this principle doesn't only apply to the aspects of physically living. Emotionally and socially I believe in this phrase. When I first meet someone, my first thought is always "I'm better than you." After a while, the idea begins to scuttle to the back of my head, but it will always be there. It allows me to assess my threats in the surrounding society. Who am I meagerly better than and who is at the bottom of the threat chart for me? That is exactly what this principle provides for my life. It effectively is my scale of where the biggest possible competitor can come from.
As to why and where I developed this principle it's hard to explain. Its origins arise from my idea that winning is everything. If your not winning than your losing. There is no in between. Consequently, by living by this credence it's a mental preparation that from the beginning gives me the upper hand in most situations. Moreover, this principle has been ingrained in my skull ever since the realization that my success is dependent on my ability to defeat others. However,throughout my lifetime its presence hasn't been truly acknowledged until Coach Parker brought it to fruition this summer. He stood in front of us before our first practice at camp and began his usual spiel about how he feels good about this year, along with all the confidence boosting phrases he likes to throw out there. Then something caught my ear. " You have to line up across from the other team and say to yourself 'I'm better than you and nothing will stop me from putting your ass in the ground.'" He then turned to our other coach who is built like Arnold Schwarzenegger and exclaimed, "See I could kick Coach Watson's ass right now if I needed to, just because I believe I can." Clearly, everyone could see he couldn't really defeat Coach Watson, but it's the thought that gives him a shot. Just hearing him say that opened the gates within the fortress known as Jordan's Mind. It was as if the reasoning to my life had just been served on a golden platter to me. The realization that this had been the guiding principle for the entire sixteen years of my life, had utterly blown me away. Needless to say that was possibly my best practice, considering I was now debasing every other player I came across in my head.
Ultimately, this principle has been subconsciously portraying itself throughout my life, until this year when it moved from the subconscious realm to the conscious one. Once again I apologize for the conceited appearance this guideline gives, but it wholeheartedly is what drives every action and decision.
Note: I feel as if since I did this blog in sections parts of it seem to be in conflict with each other, to which I apologize also for that.
Myra... Wow. Ossim. And I can believe every single one from you.
Sarah... I dig the message. Living life to the anti-fullest is a waste
Ivan... When that wish comes true, I get to be Beat.
I am guided almost entirely by my own self-interest. I’ve never really thought about the principals behind it.
Every action results in either pleasure or guilt. I will give to people because it brings pleasure to me, and I will walk around the woodlands for much the same reason. I’ll be generally happier if I have done all my work, if I haven’t annoyed the people around me, if I can have intellectual discussions, and if the people around me aren’t distressed. Therefore, I’ll go out of my way to meet these conditions as often as I can.
By the same token, I will not do anything that will make me feel guilty. If I don’t turn in homework, I’ll feel like I somehow cheated the teacher. I will not steal because I know I’ll feel guilty about it for months. If my friends are unhappy, I feel like I should be helping them. It’s not really out of concern for their well-being. I know that I’ll feel guilty until I’ve done something.
I could really care less about the right and wrong of things. My pleasure and comfort always come first. I don’t really worry about other people. They are not my concern. But I help them because it’s my duty, and I’d be unable to sleep if I didn’t.
This is probably the stupidest reason I’ve ever heard for helping, or observing laws, or even for enjoying life. But it’s the only one that motivates me. I am a selfish creature. And it keeps me honest. I can’t claim righteousness if I’m only acting for myself. I can’t inflate the worth of my own actions: I know the only reason was my own pleasure.
I rather envy people who can claim a higher cause. Helping people for the sake of helping people, or for a religion. Not-stealing because it’s morally wrong, not because I know I’ll have nightmares about it afterwards. I believe that real selflessness is the highest virtue imaginable. If you can give without any benefits, real or imagined, to yourself, you’ve achieved something more than human. But I don’t think I can reach that state. If nothing else, the thought that I am being selfless would make the action selfish and cheep.
So I’ll go on living as I am. Selfishly helpful, selfishly honest, selfishly law-abiding, because I can’t deal with myself if I’m not.
-Hey Alice!
I like this quote.
"“You have the choice to decide which is more important: to attain that one big happiness that comes every once in a while or to cherish the small daily happinesses instead. Do not feel discouraged, choose both. You see…life can be hard, sometimes it might even drive you insane, but it is unpredictable too, and if you make it, fun. Don’t drown in the rushing tides after tiring your arms to stay afloat. Rather, conserve your energy and drift with the wave and you will realize that your happiness wasn’t that far at all.”"
Just thought you should know. Also I would like to say that it touches me in a sense. All day people question my idiotic actions and wonder why I purposely do embarrassing things, but this quote is what I'd like to tell them. These actions and things that I do give me happiness for the moment, and at that time its all I want. Who cares if you think I'm embarrassing or stupid, when I'm the one happy and your the one worried about my life. It's all about floating from small dose of happiness to small dose of happiness until the big walloping platter of happiness comes. As dark as life can be when you float on the minor happy feelings you get, it makes the troubles disappear for the moment. If you can float on long enough the troubles won't even matter in the long run because the platter of happiness will eventually come to you despite the darkness anyone lives in.
Thanks again for the elegant quote, it allowed me to see clearly now the rain has gone.
Myra: I agree with almost everything on your list. But why glue quarters to the floor?
Alice
Ni, I'm not sick and unless some sick twist of fate happens, I will be in school tomorrow. thanks for reading and I'm glad you enjoyed my response. However, i can not, for one second, imagine as the "bad seed". I mean, come on, i rarely ever seem you un-happy let alone mean.
Sarah C
I sure hope it was a cheap flight and if your brain must go on vacation i suggested somewhere in the tropics, the Bahamas? Although it can get quite pricey.
Meagan R
I'm sorry hear you view the world as a black of pit of greed and corruption. I know we talked about this many times before, but do you really think that the only thing that can exist if evil? Doesn't there have to be at the very least a spark of good for something to be deemed "evil"?
Vikkie
Congrats on you second chance...Dont mess it up! I mean that in the most loving and caring way possible :)
Eva
Really, selfish? That seems too strong of a word to describe you. To me you don't seem selfish, just...mesmerized by the world around you and what it does to you. You don't seem to let things get in your way instead you learn from them a sap every bit of knowledge you of it. That is an amazing quality to possess.
For all those who responded to myra, she won't be getting back to you anything soon because i had to post her blog because her computer is stupid. So she might respond later just FYI :)
I just realized how funny the people in this AP blog really are.
The outcomes of our lives are not entirely in our hands, something’s will be out of your control. You couldn’t stop that drunk driver hitting you. I couldn’t prevent my vegetarian health-nut Aunt from getting unmanageable diabetes. I’m not saying we should sit back and watch the show; it’s that there are things you can’t help. Honestly, I’m not trying to be cliché, but over the years, this has become one of my fundamental views on life.
I believe that attending Oakcrest was part of my odd destiny. There is some reason I am supposed to be here. I have lived in Mullica my whole life, but in second grade, my parents decided to look for a bigger house. While they perused houses in Hammonton and Port Republic, our house went on the market. It’s assumed that there would be several months to find a new house before any offers came in on the current, but just two weeks after the for-sale-sign went up, a serious buyer emerged. This would be great, if there wasn’t one little catch, you see the buyer wanted to move in as soon as possible. So my parents had four weeks to pack up our house and move our four-person family to a new one, not to mention we had to buy a new house first. So my parents scrambled, dropping the notion of buying this house in Port Republic, which they’d had their eye on, and grabbed the first four-bed-room-home they came across. This house happened to be in Mullica. So I moved across town and ended up at Oakcrest. Even if my parents had picked that house in Port, I still would have ended up here. There is some reason I attend Oakcrest, not Hammonton or Holy Spirit (My mom is alumni, I could have easily ended up there) I have yet to figure out why.
Then there was the day I was almost ended up with a big-rig-headlight for a face. Over the summer, I got a ride with a few people to the Buddy Walk. Before heading to Ocean City, we stopped at the Wawa down the street from Oak. When we were done, everyone got back in the car, and was set to go. The girl driving pulled out of the lot and started going through the intersection. While she drove through the middle, I was sitting in the back seat, next to the window, when I looked to my left and saw the red of a head light taking up the vicinity of my window. A gigantic Mac-truck was making an illegal turn right into us! It was about to T-bone the tiny compact car. Everyone else in the car then saw this, and the girl driving hit the gas, saving my head. After the initial shock wore off and everyone was ok, some asked who would have been hurt and who wouldn’t. The girls on the far right would have been bruised, the girl in the middle might have been slightly more injured, the driver, and I would have, ultimately, been dead. I consider that incident and its result to have been an act of chance, far out my grasp.
As I grow up, fate may intervene many more times. Right now, for certain, I know the next time I meet fate will be during college decision time. If I end up at College A, I will meet people 1, 2, and 3. If I chose College B, I will meet people 4, 5, and 6. There will be some reason I chose the college I chose. Fate will have some effect, and I may not realize it for years. Whether it’s the roommate, who introduces me to her guy friend that I end up marrying, or the professor that phones up an industry exec in my favor, which leads to my first job. I may have crappy year, which leads me to the best year yet. I could get married three times, and it might not be until husband number four that I find true love. What happens will happen. It’s important that I know how to handle what I am dealt. I also need to focus on my own goals. I can’t sit back and wait for fate.
Myra---
I believe that if no one has ever called you a freak you haven't lived
I believe that those extra nine minutes after the snooze alarm make all the difference in my day.
I believe there is no problem that can't be solved by a grilled cheese
yes, yes, and agree (that last one's probably true for me because that's the only thing i know how to cook. haha) I loved your list. It was very honest.
Brendan: "As kids, we regarded everything with a sort of wonder that made everything seem magical. As we grow older, we look back on that feeling and wonder why nothing anymore seems magical. Sometimes I think it's just nostalgia, but every now and then, something amazes me. It seems incredible, and for just a second, that sense of magic returns. That feeling is what I'm after."
Brendan, I loved your blog. I completely agreed with everything you had to say. And it really got me thinking more about who I am and what I stand for. I wish I read your blog before I answered mine because now I wish I could edit it, but I don't really feel like doing that now.
But I dread growing up and leaving behind my childlike character. The thing is, I know I won't. I'm always living in the past, and even now I hate the present because things simply aren't as good as they used to be. What I stand for isn't based on who I am now, it's who I used to be, therefore who I'll always be, and most of that comes from my childlike view on things. I always have that wonder and amazement, which is why I'm constantly asking "why" and needing to find answers and solutions and reasons. I'm not worried about who I will become because I know I hate change, I know I hate growing older, and I know I hate accepting things. Therefore who I will be will always be "me", and I'm simply a girl stuck in the past and unwilling to let go. The only bit of happiness I can ever remember are all memories of past times, so why would I want to give them up? There's not much light in this world that I can find, and I'm sure as hell not going to search for it. I never had to before, it all simply came to me. Like Brenden said, as children we found happiness in the simple things we did: playing on playgrounds, watching our favorite cartoons, etc. Why can't it always be that simple?
Jani- I really liked the part you had about walking in someone elses shoes. Do you remember ever reading a book called Walk Two Moons? I think it was by Sharon Creech. All I really remember about it is that my grandmother (yes, Jani. The FRENCH one. =P) Used to say, anytime she heard anyone in my family speaking ill of another person, "You can't know a person until you've walked two moons in their moccasins". It sticks with me even today and I can definately get where that's coming from. Excellently written as well. =]
My belief came to me suddenly, as I was sitting at my computer, trying to write a disaster of a blog, flipping through internet pages for inspiration. Just as I thought I would be able to go back to my word document to type a few more meaningless words my computer screen just went black, the same way as the back light in an ipod or cell phone goes. The information was still all on the screen, I could still see the vague outlines of a white paper on a grey background. Frantically I talked my laptop through its emotional crisis, “Come on baby,” I crooned, “you can do it… wake up – please..?”
These cries fell on deaf ears, (ears? Or speakers? Maybe keys? Who knows?) there was no response from my computer. I unplugged the power cable. Nothing – oh right it has a battery. So then as a last resort I pushed the little round key of death. Finally there was a response, it was the little blip that my laptop makes as it shuts down. So you ask, what does this have to do with my blog, other than delaying its posting? It completely changes the topic of course. Before I was going to write on how each person should be loved by someone, and how that love would affect their lives and how I wanted my life to exemplify this ideal. While this is still a very worthwhile belief, and I still hope to base part of my life off it another belief came to me that resonates deeper.
This belief is that yes the world changes and judges who you are, but you must always be content and satisfied with who you are, where you have been and what you have done. If you were to die right now, would you want to die saying, “Wow, I wish I’d done/said …” it matters not what the “…” is to you. The fact that there is a “…” is what I want to change with my belief. The actions of a person are the choices of that person. There is always a choice, if the consequences your actions disappoint, then you should’ve made different choices. No I am not saying that humans should make no mistakes, for if you do you just learn from your mistakes. It is a lack of learning that makes the mistakes bad, not their presence.
My belief was created in an instant of despair, but also a moment of happiness, perhaps my laptop has a mind of its own and was objecting to my earlier blog in the same way I was, only it had the guts to do what I did not, make me start an entirely new blog that lives up to the expectations I hold for myself. In this way I hold true to the ideal that one should not do something they are not proud of – for then they would regret it.
Molly – I have to tell you that I listened to that same speech in Chemistry, and got nothing out of it. In fact I wasn’t listening at all really, just zoning out. I’m sad that I missed this profound moment, because it seems like it was a great one to have.
Ashley – I remember the boy with the mad scientist hair, and the corner we were standing on – man was it cold! I will say that I did not hear the fancy coat comment, but I’m glad that you did so you could share it with us and impart on us the importance of wearing a fancy coat when we die.
Ali B :)
When I first attempted to write this blog, it was 10:00 in the morning, and I felt so light headed and sick that I couldn’t even muster up the strength to type, and I went to bed. Ten long hours later, I woke up, and could finally breathe again =), but Aladin was on the disney channel, so I had to watch. But finally, I began to think once again……
There are a few different beliefs that I hold near and dear, but when I really thought about it, all of these different beliefs that I hold can all be summed up into one grand package.
I try to live my life by the belief that everything that I go through happens for a reason, whether it makes you stronger, weaker, lonelier, or more skeptical. These things may not be good necessarily, and they may come in different forms. It could be a paper that you have to write, that helps you delve into your inner self, or it could be an experience with a total stranger, that you remember the rest of your life.
The people that you meet in your life all make an effect on your overall state of mind, and even though you may not realize it now, these people are teaching you lessons. For example, every day that I am slouched in my desk in Calculus trying to figure out why the heck I am even still making it in that class, I have to try to remember that Mrs. Baird is making me learn a whole class on my own for a reason, and when I fail the AP test in the spring, and have to take that class again in college, I will pass with flying colors, because I have already grasped many of the crooked upside down and incomprehensible concepts. Even though this is kind of light hearted, there are instances where people will effect yourself in such a way that these thoughts will always be on your mind.
I’m sure you have heard the story about my soccer coach, Coach Bob from either Devon or Hayley, in their occasional papers a while ago, and I have to say that when that horrible event happened, I couldn’t believe it, I WOULDN’T believe. That was the first loss that I had ever experienced in my life. Unlike Hayley and Dev, the night that the event occurred, I was not at soccer practice. About a week before that night, I had to call my coach and tell him that I was leaving the team. It hurt so much, but my parents pushed me into a more serious and older team. He told me that I would always be welcome to come back to his team if anything went wrong I could come back, and that even though I wasn’t on the team anymore, that I was still welcome to go trick or treating with them. That was the last conversation that we had. The night that it happened I will never forget where I was. I was on my way to my tryout for this new team, and we were going over the Ocean City bridge when my mom looked at me after frantically calling their house. I knew right away, and I had never felt so bad in my entire life. So many different feelings filled my body and I just couldn’t believe it. And I couldn’t understand why this had happened. It took me all this time to accept what has happened, and to understand that this only was making me stronger, and there would be plenty of events like this that will fill my life, and teach me different life lessons that I will cherish in the end.
Hils
Mr. Costal opened the literary door of Thoreau and Emerson, which, I believe, changed my outlook on a lot of things.
Ugh. Same! When I saw Into the Wild, the ideals of Thoreau came to life, and I just wished that everyone would just live their lives that way, one with nature, and all that surrounds them. =)
All through my childhood my parents have provided me with dozens of sayings to live by. The one that applies to all people, throughout their lives, is that each generation needs to get a little better than the one before it. My grandfather said this to my father, and now he is preaching it to me. My grandfather’s father died when he was a child so my grandfather didn’t have a true father figure to rely on. He needed to forge his own values. He believed that the work he did would one day lay the foundation of a new life, one for the next generation. He made it so; my father got a job through my grandfather’s connections. Now my father goes to work everyday to support my family, he pays his bills knowing that one day I will need him to co-sign student loans, and he allows me to participate in sports without slaving away at a job, while making minimum wage.
This decision has paved the way of life for my family. I get what I need, but not to excess. I cannot think of a better set of rules to raise a family under. Everything that I invest, in myself and in material possessions, I intend to pass on to my children. Too often children are left to fend for themselves. This can be a driving factor in some people; however, the cases in which they are driving factors are far too few. Investing in a healthy family environment can make the world of difference in a child’s young life. The support that is there at just the right time is imperative to the construction of a child’s mind. I know that I’ve been encouraged to push through tough times by the words of my parents. It has helped me beyond which word can describe.
I’m not saying that my family is perfect, but I feel that I am better off than many other people. This is not because anything was given to me. Living with each generation getting a little better in mind, success is within reach. If everyone lives not for themselves but for the people who will one day make up the future, everyone will succeed. Families are too often left with parents that leave. This is not looking out for the next generation. The solution to this problem is not an easy one. With work, love, and care, family bonds can persevere. After all, the children are our future.
Erik N:
I agree with the ideal view in which you saw policemen. Now all those god like figures are useless. If only we were all young forever.
Matt C:
Your blog was really, really good. I didn't want to stop reading...however, because there is always a however, i don't think i agree with you when you say:
"the basis of this is to make the decision that you feel are right and to avoid the collective eye of society burning your back as you turn away refusing to give in to its stare. It’s a hard thing to do, and I can safely say there isn’t a single person in our class who does that."
I feel quite the opposite. I think people turn their backs to the "conformity" or the "blaring gaze" of society everyday. Not constantly of course, but in small, little ways. Here's a few examples:
1) Society wants you to relish in the mundaneness of a scheduled life, a planned out life. However, you feel quite the opposite and do everything with in your power to express that belief. Even though you can't just get up and leave school, well i suppose you could, you find others ways to "do" what you feel is right.
2) Eva is a brilliant women that possess a mind with a never-ending capacity for learning. She, however, doesn't seem to care for the conventional learning style. She, from what i have gathered, wants to experience and live to learn. She takes that into her own hands everyday it seems even though most of society would view it as "a waste of time".
3) This is an ambiguous and rather cliched example. Everyday their are kids who are offered drugs (Alcohol, Mary J, etc...). their friends stare piercing through them like white-hot knives yet the still manage to buck up the courage to say "no" or simply decline.
I don't really understand how you can say no one every has achieved this? Maybe I am misunderstanding and if I am, please correct me.
Well, this blog question forced me to rifle through every famouse quoted saying I know. From the guiding spirits of Ghandi and Yoda *any quote will do* to the joke quotes that my friends make up "If at first you don't succeed say fuck the world and smoke some weed" or the always classic "When in doubt, get the hell out." No matter what quote I find, there is some truth to them all....yes, even to the ones that I just mentioned (If you really REALLY REALLY!!! dig far enough into them.) But I guess the one phrase that I found the most simple, the most helpful throughout my life (espceially adult life) and the most true and universaly acceptable (at least it should be). The wise words of Michael Scott to his "Assistant to the Regional Manager" Dwight Shrewt:
DON'T BE AN IDIOT.
-Fuck!!! I gotta retype my whole paper cause I accidentally pressed Alt Z. -
See!!!!!! This is what I mean. I understand that we all make mistakes and that some time ago some smart Jewish man said "those who never make mistakes, don't try anything new" or something like that, but these little errors pop up everywhere. Everytime they bring nothing but misory, annoyance, and more crap for me to deal with. Of course, im not hoping to gain perfection or anything from following this one rule as such a task is too hard to complete (Im sure there is a way to be perfect, but only through some strange voodoo magic.) My only hope with this is too, hopefully, remind myself of when i've been in similar past situations, and be able to learn from them to not make those mistakes again. Judging by how many times Ive made the same mistakes over and over again, this is going to be hard. At the very least, if I can't fix my self, I would like to do everything that is in my power to guide others across the same pitfalls in which I fell into the first time around.
From many different perspectives, this works out just fine. Whehter you are a kid, a teenager, or an adult, "Dont be an idiot" is a life lesson that everyone can learn from. Say you are a kid who went to the zoo. You look at all the animals on display and you find the enormous, "seemingly" harmless kitties the most intriguing and so you go and pet them. However, your mother steps in and instead of telling you a long winded boring lecture, she says "Don't be an idiot" Without another word, you know you should pet the kitties with incredibly sharp fangs. Say you are a teenager going to party. Despite what you've been telling them for the past week, the parent magically knows that it is unsupervised and there will be alcoholic beverages involved. Instead of ruining the fun and suspence of the moment by saying something like "Don't Drink" "Drive Safe" or even "You are not allowed out of this house" they say "Don't be an Idiot" Without listing their concerns, you know that the parent is well aware of the possible consequences of this party and trusts you to make the right decisions. And Vice Versa for that one.
While somewhat vague and cryptic, it makes sence. The fact that it isnt so specific allows for it to attract from many important lessons, common sence or not, to be integraded into this one phenominal idea. Its not a famouse speech by s civil rights leader or an epiphany only seen through the eyes of God, but neither of those two are even needed for one to have a joyous life. Something is simple is more then enough.
To Brendan: Yours is really kinda tipsy. I mean, I love being a kid because of all the fun I get to have. Almost limitless time to be enjoyed with friends, video games, TV, activities, and sometimes even school(on some days better then having a job). I remember always getting my way as a kid and sometiems even now, though its much harder. Of course with adulthood, we all get too leave our "cave" and explore the world that lies outside it. For a while now, Ive wanted only to grow up so that I can start living on my own. To be responsible, to be somebody, to live life by my rules. All of these just sound too good to pass up. Your answer really makes me think.
To All who listen to NPR:
Yeah, sorry, can't really back you up there. Most of my time near a radio is instead spent listening to my MP3 player. I like my songs =)
As much as I hate to admit it, I hate people. Too many people in this world are so selfish that they have little or no respect for those around them. Often times I have found myself wondering how this came to be. I feel as though only recently our nation as steadily become less and less friendly with those around them. What I truly want to know is how people can have no respect for people around them? When I see people in the hallways who are so rude and disrespectful for no rational reason I feel myself losing faith in humanity. Kurt Vonnegut once said “True terror is to wake up one morning and discover that your high school class in running the country.” This is a quote I saw a while back and it really had me thinking. Honestly the thought of the people I see in the Oakcrest Hallways running the country terrifies me. Not so much those of you who will potentially be reading this, but the class as a whole.
As much as I dislike many of the people around me I try to be a nice person. Many of you who do not know me too well may not know that I can be quite a cynical person. Despite these feelings of dislike I try to be as polite as possible to those around me. Yet as time wears on it becomes more and more self evident that too many people in this country simply do not know how to treat those around them. By no means am I implying that everyone in the country should be walking around kissing peoples butts, but I simply wish to see the general public obtain some form of respect for the people around them.
To many of you what I am saying may not make too much sense but all of these feelings seem to trace their way back to when I was still employed by KB Toys. In the short time that I worked there I have seen quite a few events that have forever changed my life. I cannot even begin to describe the rudeness of so many people that came into that store.
One instance seems to particularly stick out in my mind. One night I was working before Christmas cleaning up a pile of Wrestling action figures that were so neatly thrown all over the floor. After about ten minutes of picking up these toys, and as I was just about finished, a lady in her early forties walked up to me. She asked me if we had a certain toy in stock and I regretted to inform her that we were sold out. Apparently this was completely my fault and she felt the need to punish me because she walked over and knocked down every single action figure I had just picked up. After this took place I calmly asked her how her outburst was going to help her predicament to which she promptly left the store. There was absolutely no reason a person should act that way. So I guess what I’m trying to say is that I hate people.
Serj:
"The wise words of Michael Scott to his "Assistant to the Regional Manager" Dwight Shrewt:
DON'T BE AN IDIOT."
Let me just say that I love "The Office" and when i saw this in your blog I thought it seemed so appropriate.
"Are you a pacifist? I'm a pacifist. I like to pass my fist through your face." - 'The Bear'
I'm a man of principle. I live by a strict set of moral guidelines, and I try hard as I my body and mind allow me to stick by them.
I never lie.
I never cheat.
I never patronize.
I never demean.
Then there are my abstinences, which include:
relationships (new for this school year)
drugs (new year's 2008)
alcohol (forever and for always)
Those little rules are the things that guide my life.
Ok I can't stop wondering, what does "blood is thicker than water" mean? Let me reprhrase that: why does it mean what it means? I pretty sure I don't know anyone with water flowing through their veins. Sorry.....that just irks me.
I know what it's like to be patronized, demeaned, lied to, and cheated. Once you've felt what it's like, why would you ever want to inflict those upon others? I just don't understand why people are so willing to throw away any morals, any sense of humanity, just for a tiny gain in possibly social or academic standing. The gain falls far short of balancing out the loss, because you're losing yourself. I can remember almost every lie I've ever told, and they all make me sick, even if they appear trivial. In 6th grade I told Mrs. Hudson's class I went on a zeppelin. In 7th grade, I told Dave that I had already painted my Xbox blue and silver, when I was going to paint it red and white the next day.
I also found out this year that I hold grudges a very long time. Almost exclusively, these grudges are with myself. But sometimes, they're with other people. The most prominent one that comes to mind is a grudge I have against Jani for giving the Halloween trophy to Ricky.
It feels like every day I learn something new about myself. I can't wait to see what I learn tomorrow!
Matt:
I think you're right about how people always see the flaws in others rather than the merits. We want to see ourselves as somehow better than them, so we forgive our our flaws and scrutinize theirs. It is the way of the selfish human.
“You’re beautiful, that’s for sure
You’ll never ever fade
You’re lovely but it’s not for sure
That I won’t ever change...”
-I’m Like A Bird, Nelly Furtado
One belief in my life that I feel is very true is the fact that everyone and everything is beautiful in their own way. Everything I have seen and everyone I have met thus far in my life has proven this belief true. I believe that if you look close enough, you can find beauty in anything, it just depends if you are able to look past what you first see.
I find that I do two things when it comes to meeting people. First, I recognize if they have what others would call physical beauty. If not, I do not become less interested or less intrigued to get to know them. I get to know everyone just by being my wacky self. After talking to these new acquaintances, I judge their beauty based on whether or not I like their personality or respect them. It seems that the more I talk with someone who is, say, hilarious and spontaneous, their features begin to pop out to me. For instance, I would be talking to this very hilarious, very spontaneous person, and suddenly I think, ‘Her hair is really soft-looking” or “He has a nice shaped face.” To tell you the truth, I’m not sure if this making any sense, but it does to me. It’s my belief. Deal.
However, vice versa also happens with those who come off as vain or greedy or arrogant while indulging in a conversation with them. I will automatically begin to think, ‘Wow, I cannot believe he just said that! He’s pretty lanky,” or something of the sort. I have even been in instances where I would begin a conversation with a drop-dead gorgeous boy, and leave the conversation irritated and disgusted. So I guess what I’m saying here is that when your personality is ugly, to me, your whole aura and physical appearance fades into a blur. A blur that I no longer see as a hot guy or a stunning supermodel.
So I suppose what I am really trying to say is that I believe that inner beauty affects how beautiful you become on the outside. My first impression will always be sorting into groups of attractive or not attractive, I cannot help that. However, after I get to know a person, my first impressions always get swept under a rug somewhere that it will never be found.
I wish that more people could think this way. It would correctly sort people into groups. It wouldn’t depend on social status or wealth or looks. If you have a beautiful personality, then all material things and looks or anything becomes insignificant, or could only add to the beauty found within. Those who are not oh-so-lovely underneath it all (song reference) will finally be justly seen as they are, and NOT just for their outer appearances. If everyone in the world thought this way, so many more people would be confident in their own bodies regardless of waist sizes or heights. It wouldn’t matter when it comes down to it! This new-found confidence leads to happier lives and happier people. And what is better than an ultimately happier world?
At the end of the day, everyone who has found amazing new friends, through inner beauty rather than outer, would be able to sing Christina Aguilera’s song of confidence:
“You are beautiful no matter what they say
Words can't bring you down
You are beautiful in every single way
Yes, words can't bring you down
Don't you bring me down today...”
This world truly make the world a happier place. Everyone would feel beautiful and confident and content. I know that this cannot happen lickety-split, especially with our society, and some of you are thinking “this would never happen”, but how can we begin towards this type of thinking with one person to plant the idea? Someone who would start the revelation of beauty surrounding us. Someone like me.
Britt –
Lmao, I watched Aladdin too! Hahaha that silly Abu still cracks me up!
Aww Britt, I can’t even imagine how you must have felt...that must’ve felt so heartbreaking, and I am very close to tears. What you said is very true though. The first loss is always the hardest. I think it’s a rule or something. After that, I always think, at least now I am better prepared for the next time something terrible occurs. That was a really good blog girl. Feel better, ad take meds before getting on the bus...you’re going to get me sick. =)
I made a lot of weird wording mistakes. =(
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